Integrity: Aligning Actions with Words - Part 1

Each of us will in time accept that change in our life is needed, simply because we're imperfect and that change is therefore necessary. Yet change is difficult to integrate even as old patterns of behaviors have a negative impact on a marriage or family. Choosing to change requires a plan of action along with commitment and determination to make it happen.

It's at this point where personal integrity becomes the aligning force between what is said and what is done. Integrity keeps you centered on the truth even if you're failing miserably. Integrity brings you back to commitment and an all-out effort to do what is right. Faith provides victory over difficult obstacles.

Listen to Job 27:4-6. "My lips will not speak evil, my tongue will not utter deceit. I will not deny my integrity. I will maintain my righteousness and never let go of it." God's word consistently reminds us that change is doable when our commitment is to Him, for He is merciful and full of compassion. God provides help for making change a reality. 

Strengthening Your Integrity - Part 3

Anger is one of those emotions that makes some people want to act out in  hostile, aggressive ways. In others, anger produces withdrawal and isolation. Expressing healthy, normal anger can clear the air, articulate grievances, and establish better communications. Anger, when conveyed appropriately, can be the pathway to deeper intimacy and closeness.

Guilt, caused by inappropriate anger or by justifiable anger expressed  inappropriately, leads to damaged integrity. You can't mix integrity and guilt, just  as oil and water do not mix. Where guilt abounds, integrity suffers. As a rudder is to a ship, so integrity is to a person. Integrity keeps you on course even in the storms of life.

Integrity helps you come back from failure to reclaim God's purpose. Strengthened by God's word and the presence of Christ in you, integrity insists on confession, repentance, and forgiveness so you can do what is right to correct what is wrong. Where sin abounds, God's unmerited favor does much more abound. God's grace gives you power to change. 

Strengthening Your Integrity - Part 2

Integrity is a corrective force that keeps us on track when life seems to be lurching out of control. Accepting Christ as one's personal Savior gives strength to integrity as nothing else can. Christians are imperfect and subject to sin, so our integrity can be damaged when wrong-doing is justified to protect oneself from embarrassment or shame.

Someone said: "I don't understand what's happening to me. Instead of telling the truth, I find myself lying about everything, even small, insignificant matters of no consequence." Misrepresentations of truth result in erosion of integrity. Some Christians choose this behavioral pattern knowing it damages their integrity and self-worth.

Permitting your integrity to erode invites despair. God's plan for anyone who feels enslaved by this condition includes confession, repentance, and re-commitment of your life to Christ. Choosing God's way insures positive change, so decide now to anchor your life where there is forgiveness, a new beginning, and God's purpose for living.

Strengthening Your Integrity - Part 1

To believe all anger is wrong creates perpetual guilt. While anger may be frustrating, even destructive, normal anger can be healthy and helpful if properly channeled. Healthy expressions of anger take the initiative to correct what is wrong or unfair. Other healthy expressions of anger lead to the pursuit of knowledge and improved communications to clarify misunderstandings.

Our integrity is strengthened when anger is expressed in a non-accusatory way rather than as a means for harming and controlling others. Guilt is accrued when anger is used as a weapon against another person. Guilt will overshadow healthy integrity and eventually lead to despair.

Pursuing resolutions for anger enhances integrity. God calls us to follow his initiative in managing anger. Listen to Exodus 34:12: "The Lord is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, abounding in faithfulness and love." Choose to shield your integrity with these attributes, for they will prevent guilt from getting a foothold and dominating your life. 

Christmas: Great Expectations - Part 5

Merry Christmas!

Christmas Day is a time of great expectations, not only for children, but for most adult as well. Adults may or may not give or expect elaborate gifts, but still the desire for a happy, joyful family gathering with good food, great conversation, and laughter catches the heart and nourishes the soul. Loving care makes sure all the preparations live up to expectations.

It's incredibly important to give thanks to God for wisdom to manage all who arrive with varying attitudes, needs, and expectations. God sent Jesus to be the Light of the World, and from that light come patience and insight to help navigate the celebration of this wonderful event. Jesus, as the Light of the World, can shine brightly through you on this blessed Christmas Day! 

Christmas: Great Expectations - Part 4

Merry Christmas!

Christmas music lifts my heart and soul as I grasp the wonderful  message the composers intended for me to receive from each composition. Music revitalizes great expectations God has made possible for today and the future as we celebrate the coming of Christ Jesus. I don't know about you, but it makes me feel appreciative of what God has done as I listen and sing along with this amazing music.

What would bring you the most happiness as you celebrate Christmas this year? When I think about what God has done and the impact he has had on my life, I can't help but be thankful and joyful. With a heart of gratitude, I can say: "It is well with my soul." God bless you.

Christmas: Great Expectations - Part 3

Merry Christmas!

This wonderful season awakens great expectations and stirs up hope like no other time of the year. Christmas can yield many surprises for children and adults who receive gifts they didn't believe were possible. As we center our expectations concisely on the coming of Christ Jesus, it inspires us thank God for his great gift to us.

For many families this is a time great struggle and change related to situations that were beyond what they expected. Jesus, our loving and caring Shepherd, invites you to come to him, everyone that is burdened, sad or grieved, for he promises to be your comforter. This is God's gift to you today and always. May God bless you.

Christmas: Great Expectations - Part 2

Merry Christmas!

As Christmas Day approaches this year, I can't help wondering what my four-year-old granddaughter's expectations are today and what she will remember about this Christmas as she grows up and becomes an adult. Her expectations are, in all probability, that Santa will leave wonderful gifts for her and her family under their gorgeous Christmas tree.

It would be difficult for her to grasp the theological implication and facts portrayed in the story of Jesus' birth found in chapter 2 of Luke's Gospel. Nevertheless she will hear that story and perhaps be astonished that God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son so all people of the earth could be saved. May God bless you today. 

Christmas: Great Expectations - Part 1

Merry Christmas!

Christmas is most often accompanied by great expectations. I realize there are those whose expectations may not measure up to past Christmases when families gatherings were filled with excitement and abundant joy. Expectations change with the passage of time, but change should not negate what God intended Christmas to be.

Hope that accompanies expectations is available when we accept what does not change. God's word reminds us that the Lord remains the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. Remembering God's great love embodied in his gift of Christ Jesus refreshes our heart, rekindles our faith, and restores feelings of joy and peace. God bless you today.

God's Gifts: Love, Hope, Freedom - Part 3

When my six-year-old daughter was told by her Sunday School teacher that it was a sin to be angry, she could have gone through life experiencing guilt each time she felt this emotion. Guilt can mar one's integrity and self-esteem. False guilt is created by a flawed belief system, such as believing that all anger is a sin and that punishment awaits those who feel or express it.

Little children growing up with guilt and shame seldom feel accepted. When they compare themselves to others, they consistently fail to measure up and may come to the conclusion that it's hopeless even to try to succeed. Can you see the relationship between false guilt and the damage it can do to one's integrity and self-esteem?

Yet there is hope. God sent his son Jesus to redeem you, to make you right with himself and others. Choose to believe God has the power to cleanse and heal you from whatever has wounded you. Guilt can be unrelenting, but the power of Christ Jesus in you breaks that hold and gives you freedom and peace. This is God's gift to you.  

God's Gifts: Love, Hope, Freedom - Part 2

After Bible study and worship service, I asked my daughter, a first grader, what she learned in her class that Sunday morning. "You must never be angry, for it's a sin to be angry," was her reply. She had learned something that isn't true, for God designed us to express this emotion. However when out of control and destructive, anger can be harmful and sinful.

To be restricted from sharing your thoughts and feelings with a loving, trusting intimate other is to smother the person God created you to be. Otherwise you're pretending to be something that's false. To come to the end of life without having been able to articulate what you think and feel, which is a very important need, would be a great loss.

To avoid this loss and the despair it creates, choose to accept the freedom and autonomy God makes possible through faith and trust in Christ Jesus. Jesus said that God "has sent me to proclaim liberty to the captives." Integrity grounded in love for God, for others, and for oneself breaks the restraints of self-imprisonment. Jesus will help you do this.  

God's Gifts: Love, Hope, Freedom - Part 1

As we experience life each day we often encounter people who profess to be something they're not.  Duplicity portrays unfaithfulness or perhaps living two separate live styles. Webster defines duplicity as deliberate deceptiveness in behavior or speech. The word duplicity derives from the Latin word duplex, meaning twofold.

How does duplicity affect integrity? For integrity to be strong and able to guide us toward honesty and truth, it must be integrated with knowledge of God's word and committed to practicing what it teaches. "Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful." A person's integrity is rendered ineffective by duplicity.

Life is complicated as Jeremiah 17:9 acknowledges. "Who can understand the human heart? There is nothing so deceitful." Choosing to love God with all your heart, soul, and mind is the antidote that saves and strengthens integrity. This choice empowers us to make significant changes that reflects God's love for each of us. 

Damaged Integrity: Restoring and Rebuilding - Part 3

A person of integrity refrains from deliberate dishonesty and deception. What comes to mind when you hear the word deception? Perhaps something from your experience like being deceived into thinking or believing something that wasn't true. Deception can look and sound like truth, can have shades of truth, but beneath the surface things are not as they seem.

Have you omitted some of the facts concerning an issue because you were scared or anxious about what could happen if the whole truth were known? All of us are guilty of behaviors that have hurt or harmed others. However we can change if we feel genuine sorrow and regret for these behaviors and have made commitments to change.

Believing that hope exists for new beginnings is motivation for rebuilding a wounded integrity. Think of integrity as a guiding light within your conscience which guides you through difficult decisions that would temp you to turn from God's truth. Jesus said he is the Light of the World and in him there is no darkness. Choose to walk in his light.  

Damaged Integrity: Restoring and Rebuilding - Part 2

There's an interesting biographical book and movie called "Catch Me if You Can" about a man who was skilled in creating identities that allowed him to remain a fugitive. To him it was an art as much as it was an escape from justice. God equips us with gifts and talents, but we have the responsibility of choosing whether to use our God-given intelligence and skills for good or for evil.

Our integrity is measured by how we choose to use what God assigns us. Integrity is designed to be a guide for making godly choices. Integrity will serve as a guard against reacting detrimentally to oneself or others. In the Bible, Job is projected as a man of integrity, for in his darkest days he refused to abandon what he knew was right for him.

Being deceptive can harm or even destroy our integrity. Choose to change by believing God's purpose and plan replicates what is good and right for you. Trust God to give you wisdom to act on what will support the highest level of integrity. Jesus said, "I am the way, the truth, and the life." 

Damaged Integrity: Restoring and Rebuilding - Part 1

As we go through life, we try to be prepared for the unexpected because life is not always predictable. Parenting is seldom what we expects it to be. Marriage has lots of surprises, for there are unseen variables that are beyond our control. However as we trust that God will help us manage difficult situations, anxiety and stress can be kept within appropriate boundaries.

The inability to find solutions for common and difficult problems sets a person or family up for conflict and sometimes alienation. All of us are guilty of this behavior to varying degrees, but God designed us for change. The Lord Jesus Christ will forgive, heal, and restore where there is confession, repentance, and genuine sorrow for sin.

Our hope is found in choosing to change instead wasting our lives away for nothing of real value. The empowerment for making this choice comes by committing our lives to Christ Jesus. The reward is having integrity restored rather than lapsing into despair for the last years of life. Your choices determine your future. 

Finding Purpose in Life's Ups and Downs - Part 3

Integrity determines how success or failure is managed. Personal failure can be devastating because failure is attached to our values, morals, and sense of uprightness. It is not unusual to overestimate what we can do with the skills and abilities that God has given us, but failure does not require a denunciation of who we are as persons.

By his mercy, kindness, and forgiveness God will, by Christ Jesus, renew a meaningful and purposeful spirit within us. Finding purpose beyond failure is where integrity plays a major role. When we are enlightened and strengthened by the Holy Spirit, our integrity prevents us from lapsing into despair when failure, whether perceived or real, comes our way.

A friend was forced to take early retirement, but resigning to a life without purpose was out the question. Instead, he determined to find a new purpose for the remaining time God would give him. His integrity allowed him to use this crisis as a means for determining how all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to his purpose.  

Finding Purpose in Life's Ups and Downs - Part 2

Is it possible to live without purpose? People will devise a purpose, even if contrived of nothing more than accumulating things. Material things provide only short-term pleasure and do little to strengthen and solidify your integrity. Integrity is strengthened and fortified when you know that your life, your ideals, and beliefs exist for a significant, godly purpose.

Speaking on this subject, General Douglas MacArthur said, "You don't get old from living a specific number of years; you get old because you abandon your ideals. Years wrinkle your skin, but renouncing your ideals wrinkles your soul. Worry, doubt, fear, and despair are enemies that bring us down and turn us to dust before we die." An ideal is an honorable or worthy principle that supports integrity.

Believing you have a godly purpose for living is a wonderful choice. Purpose for living is a blessing to God that brings hope to yourself and others. Never close the door to what God can do with you, whatever your age. Jesus stands at the door of your life waiting for an invitation to come in. 

Finding Purpose in Life's Ups and Downs - Part 1

God's people often fail to live by the values they know please the Lord Jesus Christ. Integrity is built on inner moral strengths that are enlightened and empowered by God's presence. When integrity fails, it must be cleansed and set right by repentance and forgiveness. Integrity depends on a moral character that's anchored to Christ Jesus by faith and trust.

Integrity helps us face aging. A woman in her late twenties expressed  concern that the wrinkles that were forming around her eyes had been caused by the unrelenting stress of her career choice and home life. We need to take inventory regularly to see if we have concerns about aging that equal this young woman's worries.

If our integrity remains uncompromised, meaningful work helps sustain integrity while providing freedom to have a purposeful life. Philippians 2:13 reminds us  that "God is working in you to help you want to do and be able to do what pleases him." When our lives are centered on Christ Jesus, we make choices that strengthen our integrity. 

Crisis and Compromise: Choosing God's Way - Part 3

It's not unusual to get stuck in a career before understanding what best suits your personality. Someone thought you were a good fit for a particular job; an opportunity opened up, and that's been your career. Integrity is compromised at the point of knowing that something else would have been better but that too many obligations exist to risk changing.

Those who endure these situations often come to retirement feeling compromised. Who you are and what you want is often in conflict with what you have to do. However integrity is invigorated by finding meaningful life purposes beyond a career. Choosing to serve God in ways that utilize your gifts and talents prevent lapsing into sadness or even despair.

Believing that God's provides opportunities insures you can feel confident rather than languish in frustration. A clear conscience, fostered by integrity and combined with hope, gives energy for doing what God provides. Listen to Proverbs 2:6: "The Lord gives wisdom and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding." These blessings make life worth living. 

Crisis and Compromise: Choosing God's Way - Part 2

If you could choose to live your life over what would you change? Could you say, "Given the entirety of my life, I would want it to be the same"? Such a  person lives life with a healthy sense of integrity. This person has experienced the reality of God's word "that all things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to his purposes."

In fact, God desires for you to live a life of adventure and challenge while refusing to damage your integrity by deliberate, sinful choices. Do you realize that God gives you the right to determine your destiny? You can choose your own path, regardless of the cost to your integrity, or chose to follow God's plan and purposes as he reveals them to you.

There are internal, social, and spiritual imperatives for sustaining a healthy integrity. We can choose to live by specific values that identify us as the person God created and loves. We can choose to live by God's command to respect and love others as we love ourselves. Healthy integrity depends on putting God first in your life. These are choices God will bless.  

Crisis and Compromise: Choosing God's Way - Part 1

Middle-aged men and women are subject to having the wind knocked out of their sails just when they should be the happiest and most content with their life's achievements. The twenty year period between ages forty and sixty produce an alarming number of divorces. What do you think could be the reason for this sense of discouragement and alienation?

Researchers refer to the emergence of a crisis of integrity. It's not unusual for a person's integrity, that personal sense of respectability and uprightness, to become fragmented and damaged. The movie Liar Liar was based on a person's agreeing not to tell a lie, even an insignificant, small lie, for twenty-four hours. Have you tried this test of integrity?

White lies and other misrepresentations of oneself diminish integrity; yet there is hope for restoring damaged integrity. The Lord Jesus Christ makes this possible through confession, repentance, and forgiveness. Jesus enables and empowers each person to choose righteousness and faith, which is a decision for healthy, positive change. 

Integrity: Character Strength for a Lifetime - Part 3

As newborn babies, we begin life helpless and dependent on others to nurture and care for us in ways that develop feelings of safety and trust. Infants need to be loved and cherished so feelings of trust and security can emerge. Others of God's creation may nurture by instinct, but humans depend on the integrity, love, and compassion of their parents.

Feelings of safety and trust are the foundation on which all developmental stages of life are built. Therefore children need constancy and order, guidance and training, to help them develop integrity for making life's decisions throughout all the other phases of life. Integrity is the character strength that enables a person to face death, as life ends here on earth.

Refrain from idealizing integrity because it doesn't imply perfection. Integrity, strengthened by the Holy Spirit, Christ Jesus, and God's word, gives us guidance for making tough choices that life forces upon us. Integrity and appropriate behaviors form a partnership to create a clear conscience in the person who loves God and desires to please him.  

Integrity: Character Strength for a Lifetime - Part 2

Experiencing a crisis of integrity at any stage of adult development is possible. Integrity is one of those words that has far-reaching implications, for it's deeply enmeshed into our character and personality. Integrity reaches into the core of our soul and, in some respects, serves as a guiding light for all of life's opportunities and problems.

When integrity is diminished, our character suffers grave consequences. How would you define integrity? A friend in her late fifties responded with: "A person of integrity has backbone." Another friend said: "A man of integrity is a square shooter." Courage and conviction to do what is right, along with honesty, define integrity for these two people.

God intends for us to evaluate the strength of our integrity because it's vulnerable to change. Our choices sustain, elevate, or diminish integrity, so it's crucial  to remember that God supplies us with his grace, mercy, and forgiveness when sin damages our integrity. God promises to restore and strengthen our integrity as we, in faith, ask him to do so.  

Integrity: Character Strength for a Lifetime - Part 1

The years between youth and retirement often are filled with giving your absolute best for the highest possible achievement, yet both success and failure are prevalent on the pathway to retirement. You're well aware of the determined adolescent who leaves home for college only to return home a semester later unable to re-enroll because of poor grades.

Getting back on track is a requirement at specific intervals along the way to success. What helps is knowing that God is at work to provide confidence for facing an uncertain future. Jesus gave us these words of challenge. "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink, about your body, what you will wear." He's telling us to re-focus. God cares and will provide.

Moving past failure and disappointment is ultimately dependent on faith and trust in the Lord Jesus Christ, who endows us with intrinsic value and self-worth. This motivates us to be receptive to God's purpose for us as our aging consistently progresses onward. God gives us wisdom and discernment for choosing what is appropriate at each stage of our development.

Spiritual Integrity: Hope for the Family - Part 3

What does it take for the family to survive intact from all the troubles that are bound to surface? Family members will change, so wisdom and emotional energy are required to strengthen and hold the family together as it changes. The spiritual integrity of the family depends on parents' personal choices and what they model for their children.

The alternative is to avoid conflict and problems that are difficult to manage. It's an absolute necessity to believe the fact that the family is vulnerable to troubles, so taking time to evaluate priorities is a critical choice for strengthening the family. Few would argue that a successful career requires a constant investment of time and energy. Your time, skills and wisdom are a requirement for keeping your family together.

Prayer and determination are required for changing bad habits in the family system. The good news is that God stands ready to help by giving strength to the needy. Listen to Isaiah 12:2. "God is my savior; I will trust him and not be afraid. The Lord gives me strength and power." Hold fast to these promises.

Spiritual Integrity: Hope for the Family - Part 2

If you were to take stock right now, what would you say is your most important life concern? The majority of people say family takes first place, but  prayer is needed to alleviate the anxiety that comes with facing an uncertain future. Hope for the future tends to diminish where pessimism and negativity are allowed to gain a foothold, for these indicate an attitude of hopelessness.

Integrity anchored in faith and trust in the Lord Jesus Christ provides hope for the future. Integrity under-girds a belief that God faithfully supplies a good  purpose for our existence at every stage of development. Growth, change, and discovery become a never-ending process for those who maintain hope and are willing to participate in what God has to offer.

St. Paul put it this way, "For this reason we do not give up. Even though on the outside it looks as if things are falling apart, our spiritual self is being renewed day after day." Our integrity gets a boost when we put into action what we believe and know to be true of God's faithfulness, mercy, and compassion.