When Is It Appropriate to Say "No" to Someone?

Have you ever said “yes” to someone but would have preferred to say “no”? I realize there are individuals who take delight in responding negatively to whatever is asked of them. God created us, however, with the desire to please others, but can this need be inappropriate?

Trying to please to the point of losing the respect of others can be detrimental to relationships

Yet, saying “no” is not a license for acting arrogant or refusing to show respect for the feelings, needs, and thoughts of others.

It’s important to be alert to when it’s appropriate to say “no.” Keep in mind, God does not always respond with a resounding “yes” to each of your prayers. Remember, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus.” Believe God’s word.

________ 

Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy….ready for every good work.

~2 Timothy 2:21 English Standard Version

________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week. 

Can a Person Be Nice but Be Unhappy?

Is it possible to be nice but unhappy? The answer depends on what you expect from others. Someone relayed how a friend never returned favors or offered help when it was needed. Is there a point where being nice involves acting irresponsibly?

Most people believe if they’re nice, a positive return will be forthcoming and if not, then acts of generosity will be discontinued. However resisting the impulse to be nice may consequently cause guilt, shame, and sadness to surface.

But are you being unkind or sinful by refusing to be nice to someone who sees it as a weakness? Are there times when saying “no” is appropriate? The Good News Bible in Ephesians 4:29 advises you “not to use harmful words but only helpful words, the kind that build up and provide what is needed, so that what you say will do good to those who hear you.” 

Do your best to be compassionate, and imitate the Lord God.                       

_________ 

People may be pure in their own eyes, but the Lord examines their motives.

~Proverbs 16:2 New Living Translation

_________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week. 

How Do Parents Gain the Respect of Their Children?

It is within human nature to try to please others by being nice. However parents can’t always be nice if appropriate discipline and boundaries are used to teach children how to live in a family and society. Refusing to enforce rules and boundaries goes against God’s guidelines for parenting.

Making every effort to please is an attempt to avoid feeling guilty. Unreal or pseudo guilt is triggered by the failure to please everyone. At this juncture ask, “Is it better to be loved and accepted at this moment or to be respected?”

Most parents know children will not always like them, maybe even hate them.

Children who respect their parents go out into the world with a greater chance for success than those who have been pampered and coddled. Let this appeal be yours from Psalm 25:4-5: “Show me your way, O Lord. Teach and guide me in your truths, for you are my God and my hope.”

_________ 

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

~Isaiah 55:8-9 New International Version

_________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week.