Why Does God Permit Unhappiness?

Why God permits unhappiness to exist is a question that has been continuously asked because it intrudes into everyone’s peace of mind. A persistent cause of unhappiness is failure to live up to expectations. Failure is often unavoidable, for it’s impossible to succeed in every endeavor.

When children fail to live up to their potential, disappointment can last indefinitely without parental intervention and encouragement. It’s easy to rally around success, but helping children grieve through failure and loss is difficult, but possible. Helping them reach their potential is a God-given responsibility.

While God permits unhappiness to exist, he does not create it. If we  honestly, with God’s help, examine our lives, we will discover behaviors and mindsets responsible for our failures and unhappiness. James 5:16 tells us to confess our sins and failures to one another, for confession frees the soul and spirit to be healed by God.  

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[The Lord] heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds [healing their pain and comforting their sorrow].

~Psalm 147:3 Amplified Bible

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How to Heal from Deep Unhappiness

You don't have to live for an extended period of time before coming up against the cutting edge of unhappiness. Cutting-edge unhappiness pierces deep into your feelings. While unhappiness is not fatal, it may feel like you will never recover from the heartache caused by an important failure or loss.

When unhappiness strikes, the first reaction may be to believe the suffering that pierced your heart and soul will never end. In the darkness of unhappiness, pain can be so intense it’s often impossible to see your complicity in causing your suffering. The most appropriate action to take is to accept responsibility for what you know is yours to claim.

Eventually, healing from unhappiness is possible as you permit Jesus to administer the medicine of forgiveness into your heart and soul. Happy and blessed are you, who realize your helplessness and put your trust completely in Christ Jesus. He is capable of healing you and giving you joy for living.                             

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O send out your light and your truth, let them lead me; Let them bring me to your holy hill and to your dwelling places. Then I will go to the altar of God, to God, my exceeding joy. ...Why are you in despair, O my soul? And why are you restless and disturbed within me? Hope in God and wait expectantly for him, for I shall again praise him, [who is] the help of my sad countenance and is my God.  

~Psalm 43:3-5 Amplified Bible

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Happiness Vs. Unhappiness

Unhappiness should be considered temporary rather than constant. There are situations when unhappiness is appropriate. Grief caused by the passing of a loved one, a divorce, or an extended illness creates periods of sadness. The degree of unhappiness should subside with the passing of time and healing.

When sadness or grief lingers indefinitely, an emotional or physical abnormality is preventing healing from taking place. Believing unhappiness is one's lot in life should be discarded and replaced by trusting God for the initiative to search for happiness produced by healthy relationships and meaningful life experiences.

Happiness is acquired by trusting that God designed you for a purposeful life. Listen to this challenge from Jesus in Matthew 5:3: "Happy are those who know they need God, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to them." They are dependent on God to be the source for happiness and joy. You can trust Jesus to be your guide for every event life presents.  

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I would have died unless the Lord had helped me. I screamed, “I’m slipping, Lord!” and he was kind and saved me. Lord, when doubts fill my mind, when my heart is in turmoil, quiet me and give me renewed hope and cheer.

~Psalm 94:17-19 The Living Bible

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How Can We Escape the Web of Unhappiness?

What causes unhappiness and why do so many people seem to be caught in its web? It is true that after the age of five or six, children have the capacity to remember experiences that were so painful that healing seems out of sight. Some researchers believe there is a genetic predisposition for unhappiness.

There are numerous ways to respond to unhappiness, regardless of its origin. Some individuals try to free themselves by having affairs or engaging in excessive work. Others try to slip through the web of unhappiness by overindulgence in drugs and alcohol. Extreme pleasure-seeking is another attempt to break away.

Any form of unhappiness, regardless of its origin or cause, creates grief because something has been lost. To grieve is the best way to heal, as Jesus pointed out in Matthew 5:3. "Blessed or are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted." This does not mean grieving is pleasant, but it’s God’s way to restore joy and peace.  

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When [God’s] people pray for help, he listens and rescues them from their troubles. The Lord is there to rescue all who are discouraged and have given up hope. The Lord’s people may suffer a lot, but he will always bring them safely through.   

~Psalm 34:17-19 Contemporary English Version

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Can Unhappiness Ever Be Beneficial?

The majority of people accept the fact that happiness cannot be permanently sustained. Happiness is dependent on too many variables and evaporates if our expectations fail or when we’re confronted with disappointment. Can unhappiness be healthy or beneficial?

Unhappiness can bring together the power and strength of your soul and spirit to discover solutions made available by the Holy Spirit. Conflict that exists in a relationship or within oneself can be resolved if you seek God himself with all your heart. This will restore peace between you and God by creating a climate for healthy change.

While God does not prevent unhappiness from being intrusive, he never intended for it to be permanent. Jesus said, "I am the light of the world and in me there is no darkness." This means that problems and troubles will show up, but the light that Jesus is will be your guide and hope for managing any darkness that’s trying to create unhappiness. God bless you.  

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Sorrow is better than laugher, for sorrow has a refining influence on us.

~Ecclesiastes 7:3 The Living Bible

 

So humble yourselves under God’s strong hand, and in his own good time he will lift you up. You can throw the whole weight of your anxieties upon him, for you are his personal concern.

~1 Peter 5:6-7 Phillips – New Testament in Modern English

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Forbid Unhappiness to Be Permanent

Success by itself cannot create a permanent state of happiness or contentment. Thomas Carlyle, the Scottish philosopher, noted, "Man's unhappiness is related to his potential because he possesses a God-consciousness but may deny his existence or, through sheer willpower, determine to live without him."

Thomas Carlyle expressed one of life’s most persistent temptations. Pushing God out of your consciousness does not diminish his power or presence. It’s possible for unhappiness to become so persistent that it becomes accepted as normal. Instead, realize that difficult times do not mean you have lapsed into perpetual unhappiness.

You can discover joy when the trials of life have pushed you to the breaking point. How is this possible? Realize that God is present wherever you are. Consistently share with God what is happening to you. Joy is possible in all circumstances when you realize God's unfailing love will provide solutions. Pray for patience.                     

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I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the Lord.

~Psalm 40:1-3 New Living Translation

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How Can We Cope with Unhappiness?

 Unhappiness at some level is inescapable regardless of financial status or social astuteness. So many childhood stories close with, "And they lived happily ever after." Only in fairy tales is the future perfect and assured. In reality, unwanted challenges and problems are a normal part of life.

Unhappiness is often associated with feeling entrapped by situations or relationships where change seems impossible. Whatever the cause of unhappiness, the temptation to accept it as permanent may appear as the only option. So many individuals believe this is what God intended for them.

From the beginning people have struggled with evil in the world and within themselves. While God permits us to suffer the hardships of temptation, he helps us cope with the ensuing unhappiness by forgiving us. Believe Jesus came to seek and to save the lost by offering you his unfailing love and mercy. This is the pathway to joy and peace.            

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[Jesus said:] If you are tired from carrying heavy burdens, come to me and I will give you rest.

~Matthew 11:28 Contemporary English Version

 

Many sorrows come to the wicked, but abiding love surrounds those who trust in the Lord. So rejoice in him, all those who are his, and shout for joy, all those who try to obey him.

~Psalm 32:10-11 The Living Bible

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