Stress Management: God's Gift of Insight - Part 3

Have you wondered how children growing up in the same home can turn out so differently? Even when troubled families expose children to chaos and  violence, some manage to sidestep the dysfunction to establish successful lives. They have unique insight on how to avoid enmeshments that leave others in a state of hopelessness.

Gaining insight is a lifetime endeavor and becomes a lifeline for every stage of life. A man described how his eighty-year-old father had keen insight for managing the issues and stress of aging. Insight enables a person to withstand the turbulence and unpredictability of life. Insight builds competence for asking difficult questions and accepting hard answers.

One important insight is knowing God gives us peace when the stressors of life could be overwhelming. Proverbs points out the way. "Follow the steps of the godly and stay on the right path, for only the righteous enjoy life to the fullest." So search for godly role models and remember, Jesus challenges us to come and learn from him.  

Stress Management: God's Gift of Insight - Part 2

Have you ever had to confront a problem that was so important, you were willing to do whatever was required to find a solution? The insight gained from such an experience is a treasure worth keeping. Someone defined insight as "the mental habit of asking searching questions and giving honest answers." This is required for managing the reality of everyday stress.

Insight includes understanding and wisdom. Proverbs 1:7 asks this pertinent question: "How do people become wise?" The answers is "trust and reverence for God." Proverbs 2:1 gives another step. "Every person who listens and obeys God's instructions will be given wisdom and good sense." Insight and wisdom provide skills for managing the stressors of life.

Insight strengthens resilience, which enables God's people to manage stress appropriately. In the Gospels, Jesus consistently modeled insight and resilience which came from knowing God his Father and his Father's word. While we do not have perfect insight or understanding, God promises to give us wisdom when we ask for it.  

Stress Management: God's Gift of Insight - Part 1

Surviving from trouble in this world unscathed emotionally or physically is impossible. Yet some people believe they should be exempted from hardships. When the struggles of living surface God's goodness is questioned. Stress overload may cause the toughest personality to react in ways that are contrary to personal values and beliefs.

No matter what your status in life is, stress will seek you out because stress is a natural part of living. How it's managed determines whether it has a positive or negative effect on you as a person. God gives insight plus emotional and physical stamina for coping with stress, regardless of its source.

So how do you cope with unwanted stress? One way is to shift your focus from the source of agitation to whatever God has provided that makes your life worth living. Secondly, give thanks to God with a sincere, appreciative heart. "Count your blessings, name them one by one, and it will surprise you what God has done." This will put a productive spin on stress management.  

Resisting Stress: God Empowers - Part 3

What's the greatest challenge you've had to face? For some people a challenge is welcomed. Challenge suggests that  a possibility for change exists. For others, challenge staves off boredom and stress, which is similar to pressure you feel when overloaded with too much to do and not enough time to get it done.

To feel challenged is an invitation to test your competence. Challenge demands engagement outside of what's commonplace. I'm not referring to extreme risk-taking, but being pushed to use your mental, physical, and spiritual capacity to do what's within your integrity and skills to do. Integrity implies strength of character to handle stress effectively.

Hardiness of character does not imply the absence of weakness, but rather the willingness to face challenges made possible by faith that comes as a gift from the Lord God. True disciples of Christ have weaknesses, but they know their purpose is to engage the world as a witness for Christ Jesus. This confidence provides strength to contend with the stress they're sure to encounter. 

Resisting Stress: God Empowers - Part 2

Stress affects everyone because the pressures of living cut across all  boundaries of society. One of the mysteries of stress is that it effects people differently who face similar situations. There are those who succumb to stress and develop ulcers, migraine headaches, and other physical symptoms that can render them unable to function.

Stress-resistant people are open to change and see stress as a challenge rather than a threat. Change is necessary for the prevention of mental, spiritual, and emotional stagnation. Where change is unwelcomed, crises in relationships  or within oneself are assured. Crises point to a decisive moment when a person fails to alter the way life is lived.

People who are stress-resistant portray a hardiness of character and possess an attitude that's open to challenging the status quo. Individuals willing to change understand that stress levels depend on how a specific life event is appraised. They know God gives each believer a measure of faith and courage to challenge troubles that come their way.  

Resisting Stress: God Empowers - Part 1

The word stress can be defined differently for anyone managing a difficult situation. "I'm stressing," is a negative expression known to everyone who believes stress is undesirable; yet without stress there would be limited motivation to make needed and necessary changes. Stress challenges us to reach outward and inward for solutions to bad situations.

While it's true that stress can be overwhelming, it doesn't have to be disastrous. If your attitude encourages surrender and defeat, then stress can be devastating. It's your attitude that supports the will to challenge difficult situations. The readiness to challenge and change situations determines the negative or positive influence stress has on your life.

When Jesus called his disciples, he endowed them with resilience that made it possible to challenge and change what they previously believed was impossible to do. When troubles came, their faith prevented stress from becoming overwhelming. They believed Christ Jesus was on their side and was the source of their empowerment. This is what he offers to you.  

Manage Conflict: Commit to Engage and Change - Part 3

Stress is inescapable. It meets us at work, at home, in traffic, and everywhere. How stress is managed is connected to our personality, education, training, and belief systems. People whose attitude is amenable to change and healthy challenge appear to have a healthier stress tolerance than those who rate low on these attributes.

I was impressed by a seventy-eight-year-old widow who decided she still had something to offer society. She set out to find a place for herself rather than stay home and rest, as her children advised her to do. She remains bright and spunky, capable of driving herself to exercise class, computer classes and several volunteer opportunities.

Significant is the renewal of her fellowship with Christ Jesus, including Bible study with other believers. Even at seventy-eight she's a model for self-control and self-determination. 2 Timothy 1:7 gives meaning and purpose to her. "For God did not give you a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, love, and self-control."  That defines a stress-buster.  

Manage Conflict: Commit to Engage and Change - Part 2

Couples get married believing they will live happily forever. When fantasy collides with reality, disillusionment can lead to despair. Disillusionment is created by failing to know and correctly understand another person. Couples ignore differences in each other's belief systems and personalities so that negotiating real differences will be based solely on each other's integrity and willingness to change to save the relationship.

The first wife of the architect Frank Lloyd Wright as well as his six children  gave up on him because he was unavailable, unengaged, and aloof. He had a type of resilience and hardness of character that made it impossible for him to be warm, loving, and involved as a father and husband.

Peter had a presumptuousness that had to be confronted. Jesus asked him: "Are you more than a friend? Do you love me unconditionally? Are you willing to step outside of your protective walls so you can love me completely?" Will you let Jesus choose you for his service?

Manage Conflict: Commit to Engage and Change - Part 1

A young man and woman in their late twenties, engaged to be married, decided to seek counseling before setting the wedding date. In the counselor's office, the future groom complained that his fiancée needed to discuss in minute detail every aspect of their wedding. She complained he would not talk about anything unless pushed to do so.

Conflict centered around communication styles and different needs. Trying to engage her fiancé in something other than surface talk created resistance, which caused the young woman to feel anxious and rejected. She, however, learned not to be put off by uncomfortable feelings. If important issues could not be resolved immediately, she learned to wait for a more opportune time.

Resilience is overcoming obstacles to reach an objective. When Jesus asked Peter three times if he loved him, he was seeking a commitment that Peter seemingly had trouble giving. Jesus was asking for more than a minimal commitment. He wanted Peter's complete loyalty, including his promise to be faithful. This is what Jesus is asking from us.  

Change, Challenge, and Convictions of Steel - Part 3

Engagement is a wonderful word most often referring to a couple's decision to make their relationship exclusive. Engagement means entering a covenant bond with promises regarding roles and behaviors to be honored for a lifetime. The integrity of each person entering this covenant bond affects the endurance of the relationship.

Engagement is an essential factor in communication. Engaging a person in conversation means more than exchanging words. It indicates two people are on the same track and their exchange of words is meaningful. To engage another person means to give value to that person, and it goes beyond words to give recognition to what another is feeling.

Resilience is related to staying on track rather than getting sidetracked. Jesus in John 21 demonstrated resilience with Peter when he asked him three times, "Peter do you love me?" Jesus was aware of the trials yet to be endured by Peter. He engaged and challenged Peter by asking for a commitment that would endure regardless of hardships yet to be faced.

Change, Challenge, and Convictions of Steel - Part 2

People who are able to endure life's hardships tend to view change as a challenge rather than a tragedy. These people believe change is imminent.  For others, change must come at a deliberate pace to activate coping skills and keep change within acceptable boundaries. For some, change is seen as a challenge to explore new frontiers.

Loss of employment can be seen as an opportunity to find a job that's more compatible with one's personality and skills. Or consider the elderly couple who must sell their home because upkeep is too difficult. While this may create grief and anxiety, moving to assisted living can instill feelings of relief and security.

It's imperative to believe that God will help you face troubles and resolve any issue. The Holy Spirit's job is to put steel in your convictions as you submit to him. God gives you faith that becomes unshakable. Hardiness of character, a blessing from God, enables you to view change as a challenge rather than a tragedy. 

Change, Challenge, and Convictions of Steel - Part 1

Stress is an inescapable fact of life. Too much stress interferes with job productivity and personal effectiveness in relationships. Physical pain and illness can be stress-related. Research indicates that it isn't situations that overload a person with stress, but how situations are perceived. Resilience, the ability to flow with life's events, is a major factor in limiting the effects of stress.

Resilience is attributed to emotional and physical hardiness. Hardiness indicates toughness of character, strong convictions, and the ability to endure change. People with hardiness of mind and soul have the ability to perceive change as a challenge that's intertwined with their convictions.

What builds convictions made of steel like those possessed by the Christians at Thessalonica? The Apostle Paul attributed this to their unrelenting, passionate faith in Christ Jesus. This gave hope for the future and determination to do the work Christ Jesus assigned them. While this is energizing, it also keeps stress at an acceptable level.

Never Give Up! God Will Send Help - Part 3

Recently a friend related that he was sure God called him for an important purpose. Seemingly impossible obstacles had appeared immediately from every- where. Whatever could go wrong did as a test of his determination to stay on task. He knew God's purpose for him was good and do-able, and this enabled him to rebuke every negative thought and resist every temptation Satan hurled at him.

No matter how determined the forces were to sidetrack him, the certainty of God's call gave him courage to stay focused. A compelling factor was a godly hope for the future - hope of God's blessings for others and himself. Hope gives resilience power to stand firm, regardless of disturbing distractions.

The Apostle Paul gave these encouraging words to the Christians at Thessalonica. "It's clear that God loves you and has put his hand on you for something special. When we preached to you, it wasn't just words. Something happened in you. The Holy Spirit deposited steel in your convictions." Where there's steel in convictions, there's hope for the future.