Jealousy or Forgiveness? It's Your Choice - Part 2

Children are keen observers of the attitudes and behaviors their parents model for them. In the story of the prodigal son, imagine what the older brother was thinking and feeling when he observed his father give away property to his younger brother, who would sell it and leave home for an extended period of reckless living? He would later witness his father maintain a vigilant watch each day for the return of the younger son.

Picture the lavish reception this wayward son received from his father when he returned home in abject poverty. The older brother was not happy. He felt threatened, betrayed, and defensive. He believed he was not as special as his brother although he had worked hard, followed his father's rules, and remained obedient.

Is it fair for God to be as accepting of someone who has enjoyed a life of sin and reckless living as he is of someone who has always been faithful? Your answer could  be based on which of these two brothers you more clearly identify with. The good news is, God's love and mercy are greater than all your sins.

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As of Monday, March 21 new posts now occur 3 days of each week on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.

Blog posts will coordinate with the radio broadcast schedule of Attitudes/Answers that airs at 5:45 PM on KHCB radio at 105.7FM in the Houston area. To stream it live or for a listing of sister stations in TX, OK, LA, and FL, you may click on the KHCB link in the "About Me" section of this page.

Jealousy or Forgiveness? It's Your Choice - Part 1

When the prodigal son returned home, his father was so happy that he ordered a celebration with music, dancing, and special food. But this was bad news for the older son, who felt angry and refused to participate. Listen to the hurt feelings he expressed to his father. "Look, all these years I've slaved for you. Yet, you never once gave me a party. But when this irresponsible son of yours shows up, you offer a fantastic family celebration."

Did the older brother have good cause for his anger? He was responsible, hard-working, and dedicated but felt his father never recognized him for his work and loyalty. Now he felt angry and threatened by the father's acceptance and forgiveness of his irresponsible, worthless brother.

What prevented the older brother from celebrating his brother's return? Perhaps he failed to understand that his father's unconditional love was not based on performance or faithfulness. This father did not love the older son less for being faithful and loyal. The father's love surpassed the bad choices of his younger son. God's love for you surpasses your bad choices.  

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As of Monday, March 21 new posts now occur 3 days of each week on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.

Blog posts will coordinate with the radio broadcast schedule of Attitudes/Answers that airs at 5:45 PM on KHCB radio at 105.7FM in the Houston area. To stream it live or for a listing of sister stations in TX, OK, LA, and FL, you may click on the KHCB link in the "About Me" section of this page.

Never Too Late to Change - Part 3

The parable of the prodigal son portrays a father vigilantly waiting for his lost son to come home. When this wayward son came into view, the father ran to meet him. The Living Bible tells us the father was "filled with loving pity and ran to hug and kiss his son." This father never gave up on his independent, self-indulgent, defiant son.

This father had the right to be angry and hurt. He could have said, "You're a disgrace to the family. You're not welcome here so keep on walking. I will not rescue you from the mess you've made of your life." These words would portray a father who refused to trust or forgive his son for the pain and suffering he caused.

However this man had already forgiven his son since a father's love is not dependent on whether his children are successes or failures. The father's faith never lost sight of the young man's potential, so he could encourage him to live up to that potential. God encourages us to model the father's faith and choices to forgive and renew trust.

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As of Monday, March 21 new posts now occur 3 days of each week on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.

Blog posts will coordinate with the radio broadcast schedule of Attitudes/Answers that airs at 5:45 PM on KHCB radio at 105.7FM in the Houston area. To stream it live or for a listing of sister stations in TX, OK, LA, and FL, you may click on the KHCB link in the "About Me" section of this page.

Never Too Late to Change - Part 2

Come with me for a moment and visualize the scene of a wayward son returning home. Imagine the joy his father feels when he sees his strong-willed son walking toward the house and wondering what kind of reception awaits him. This father had permitted his immature son to leave home with his inheritance and dreams that would result in abysmal failure.

After talking with his son, the father detected a radical change in his son's attitude that inspired him to shout with joy, "This son of mine was dead and is alive. He was lost and is found." A man separated from his wife said he was willing to work toward reconciliation when he detected in his wife something that gave him hope for a new beginning.

Everyone is capable of dying emotionally to another person or even God when joy no longer exists in a relationship. If this is your situation, the Lord Jesus Christ is waiting and watching for your return. Jesus will eagerly receive you back as a faithful son or daughter and restore the joy of your salvation. 

Never Too Late to Change - Part 1

The experiences of life, both positive and negative, work together to shape what we believe and how we behave. God designed us for growth, maturity, and change. An eighty-four year old woman proudly stated, "I'm still learning and changing." What we know and believe provides meaning and purpose to life.

When the prodigal son chose to go home and face his family, his attitude and mind-set had changed. His experience in the pig pen reshaped his entire belief system. He left home with an attitude of arrogance but returned with humility. Arrogance portrays false confidence. Humility reveals an attitude of flexibility, readiness to learn, and willingness to be transformed.

The father was so delighted to have his son back home that he celebrated by giving him a robe and ring and by throwing him a huge party. The pig pen experience helped the young man accept his father's love and generosity. This parable illustrates God's attitude toward us when we repent and return to him. 

Rising Up, Finding Hope - Part 3

Unexpected turns in life add spice to daily routines. However too much spice and rapid change can be disorienting and overwhelming. Imagine the young man in Jesus' parable of the lost son leaving home to find his bliss. He had plans and a pocket full of money. Yet he ended up in poverty, feeding hogs.

He was naive and spent his inheritance on his so-called friends and reckless living. Yet in the depths of personal crisis he demonstrated a sensibility  that allowed him to make a good choice. He stood up to failure and got his life back on track. The sensibility he possessed was faith in his father's compassion, love, and integrity.

If you're arrogant and hold out for everything, you may walk away with nothing. This young man returned home with an attitude of a servant. His arrogance had changed to humility. The right attitude for God to assist you in making effective choices is found in Psalm 29:9. "He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way." This can be your choice.  

Rising Up, Finding Hope - Part 2

Everyday life presents challenges that demand reevaluation of past choices. Intense conflict or crisis requires determination to set in place a desirable outcome. Reframing necessitates being open to alternative behaviors and opinions in order for conflict to be managed successfully.

The prodigal son lost his way but made a decision that changed his life. Reframing meant visualizing an alternative to the abject poverty of his body and soul. Reframing gave him courage to rise up from shame and failure and find his way home. He found hope for his life in spite of the hardships he brought on himself.

Isn't it just like God to extend his grace and mercy to us, to supply answers to hard questions, and help us find our way back home? God gives us the will to face reality regardless of how that reality is defined. He gives insight for making choices that will change the downward spiral that your life is taking. Ask him to help you do this today.

Rising Up, Finding Hope - Part 1

Trust is an intellectual and emotional process that helps us to make sound judgments. Trust makes life normal and predictable by securing the safety and reliability of our relationships. Trust fights against anxiety and fear by activating faith in Christ Jesus. St. Paul challenged the fear of death by trusting that his faith in Christ Jesus would deliver him safely into the presence of God himself.

When the young man in Jesus' parable of the lost son faced an uncertain future and even death, he activated a fragile trust that had been overshadowed by a facade of self-confidence and false assumptions. Trust enabled him to deal effectively with a troubling, harsh reality.

Trust permits us to reframe a bad situation in order that a desirable outcome can be achieved. The prodigal son trusted his father to welcome him home where he could mature into the person God intended. Trust is the assured reliance on another's integrity. Trust is what God desires from us.

Come Out of the "Pig Pen": Rethink Your Choices - Part 3

The parable of the prodigal son is appealing because most everyone can identify with his dilemma. Our society requires that we grow up and become independent. Although this is a natural process, it's not always simple or easy. Some young people make several attempts before succeeding. Leaving home can propel a young person into an uncertain future.

The young man in Jesus' parable made serious mistakes that left him in despair. Remarkably, he didn't blame others for his failure. Nor did he try to rationalize or justify his immaturity, poor judgments, or bad behavior. To justify or rationalize means to absolve oneself of blame in order to be free of responsibility for personal choices.

The prodigal son reframed who he could be and thus freed himself to crawl out of the pig pen of failure. Reframing is the ability to put reality into an acceptable mental, spiritual, and emotional context so positive change can be activated. Christ Jesus stands at the door of your situation prepared to help you make life-changing decisions, so why not invite him to do so?

Come Out of the "Pig Pen": Rethink Your Choices - Part 2

I heard a story about a man who wanted to quit the Mafia. He became convicted of his sins after accepting Jesus as Lord of his life, but you just can't say good-bye to the Mafia. A contract was issued to kill him. However the contract became invalid when the Don who issued the contract was assassinated. His mother's prayers helped him reframe his past choices.

This man had the ability to understand what's important and find the will to make needed changes. He could not balance being a Christian with continuing to work for the Mafia as a criminal. Reframing allowed him to make a significant shift in what is valued, in what it actually means to serve Christ Jesus with every aspect of his life.

The prodigal son made that shift. He knew where he belonged. For this rebellious young man, a crisis threatened his life that forced him to see clearly who he was and what he needed to do. Reframing puts into perspective the fact that God is waiting for you to come to yourself and make the decisions that will lead you back to him. 

Come Out of the "Pig Pen": Rethink Your Choices - Part 1

Getting into trouble isn't unusual for young people or adults. Impulsive or bad choices are the gateway to conflict that must be correctly managed. Learning to deal constructively with reality by setting boundaries is needed throughout life.

The prodigal son left home with high hopes and big dreams, but he was arrogant and naive. Yet he eventually proved he could make appropriate decisions and reshaped his life when faced with adversity and failure. Reframing allowed him to shift from previous attitudes that had left him in great pain and suffering.

Luke 15:17 pictures this young man refraining previous choices. "When he came to his senses, he said,  'How many in my father's home have food to spare and here I am starving to death. I will go to my father and say, I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me as one of your hired men. So he got up and went to his father.'" He left home with the ability to reframe past choices and change his way of thinking. Reframing is God's gift to you, so please use it.

Consequences of Positive and Negative Reality - Part 3

It's not unusual for young people to dream of exciting adventures. Luke 15 describes a young man who wanted to escape from an unacceptable future, so he decided to pursue his dream of high adventure. In desperation, his dream ended in a farmer's hog pen filled with shame and humiliation.

It's normal to pursue self-determination and adventure, but being naive, impulsive, impatient, and unwilling to pay your dues often leads to disaster. God does not desire for us to end up in a pig pen, regardless of a how pig pen is defined. He does allow us to get there by our own devices, including disregard for truth and reality.

God eventually gives us opportunities to change bad choices. Elijah, the great Old Testament prophet got so depressed he wanted to give up and die while hiding from Jezebel, a powerful woman who was determined to kill him. In that depressed state, Elijah received insight from God on how he could continue to be a blessing to God's people and to God himself. God will do that for you.

Consequences of Positive and Negative Reality - Part 2

Conflict continuously exists between what we want and the boundaries of reality. Economic downturns, changes in governmental policies, death of a loved one, divorce, failure, and success are reality events associated with conflict. The prodigal son from Luke 15 wanted control of his life and financial resources to sustain him indefinitely.

What couldn't be controlled was weather conditions that created a food shortage just as his finances became depleted. The reality he encountered was so desperate he was forced to reframe his life's objectives. Reframing means making adjustments to thinking patterns that are out of compliance with reality.

Turning from bad behaviors and pursuing forgiveness became the young man's objectives as he reexamined his past choices. These behavioral changes were required for making a new beginning. God provides courage to escape the confinement of any self-imposed hog pen. So give thanks to God for sending Jesus to deliver you from the ongoing reality of sinful choices.  

Consequences of Positive and Negative Reality - Part 1

Everyone has escaped or will feel the need to escape reality in some way. At the beginning my military basic training, a young man suffered a grand mal epileptic seizure. The medics took him away and we never saw him again. He thought he could leave his medical issues at home, so he enlisted in the Air Force and ceased taking his medications.

Making an all-out effort to escape dependence on medication and a negative identity, he devised a plan that was doomed to failure. The young man's denial encountered a harsh reality. Imagine returning home and carrying the burden of shame and humiliation.

The young man in Jesus' story of the prodigal son fostered fantasies that also would end in failure. When these fantasies became contaminated with the stench of a hog pen, his ability to deal constructively with that reality surfaced. Reality instilled in him determination to go home and face his father who loved him. Acceptance of reality activates God's help, so if the need exists, choose to return and renew your relationship with him now.

False Assumptions vs. Reality - Part 3

It's fair to say most people want to enjoy good relationships, find gainful employment, and feel secure. Achieving these goals rarely happens without some unexpected detours along the way. Can you imagine the worst possible situation you could experience? Perhaps you've been there, done that, but what helped you survive and face reality?

Jesus' parable of the prodigal son teaches us how to deal constructively with reality. The young man in the story left home with hopes and dreams for a wonderful life. Unfortunately, he lacked the maturity to make healthy, wise decisions. Consequently, he found himself in a desolate place feeding hogs to survive, which for him was the epitome of shame and humiliation.

What got him into trouble? He was arrogant and naive, which distorted his ability to deal effectively with reality. Most of us have been there or are presently on the way. The good news is, God permits us to make directional changes when we're mature enough to choose his plan and purpose for our lives.

False Assumptions vs. Reality - Part 2

The ability to deal constructively with reality is based fundamentally on faith and trust in God to sustain you, no matter how terrible or twisted reality appears to be. A woman revealed with frustration how everyone she met seemed to have an ulterior motive or hidden agenda behind their friendliness.

This seemed to be true for the young man in Jesus' parable of the lost son. With his inheritance depleted, his friends were nowhere to be found. Even the farmer who hired him to feed hogs had little respect for him. Yet it was in this setting that he shifted his thinking, which allowed him to confront reality, including facing his family and making amends.

False assumptions got him into trouble, but the willingness to shift his thinking alerted him to choices for changing his life. This young man had faith in his father's love for him that allowed the father to forgive his foolish choices and behavior. The father had faith in his son's ability to eventually deal constructively with reality, which is God's plan for each of us.

False Assumptions vs. Reality - Part 1

The parable of the prodigal son from Luke 15 parallels our lives in interesting ways. It's about a young man who could not compete with his older brother's privileges and power. He assumed that if he left home he could be successful in his own right. The father permitted this young man to follow his dreams. The story is about distinguishing false assumptions from reality.

False assumptions blind a person's ability to correctly perceive reality. Imagine the fantasies this young man possessed. He would separate from his family and find his own way in the world. He evidently assumed that life is a party and his inheritance would sustain him indefinitely.

One other assumption this young man surely held was that his friends would have his back when he needed them. Waking up to the truth takes time, but then choices based on reality can be set in place. Truth based on reality believes that God is at work to save you from yourself. The Lord Jesus Christ will help you sort out false assumptions and give you faith to change.

Crisis and Reality - Part 3

Reality is an interesting word, given that individuals often perceive a situation or experience differently. The ability to manage reality in healthy ways  depends on the experiences, emotional stability, and character of each person. When loved ones go into the world to discover their reality, these choices can be painful and scary.

The father Jesus referred to in Luke 15 realized his son would embark on a  journey that was subject to failure, danger, or even death. Reality for the young man included a great adventure, success, and fun. The father's reality was the  potential loss of his son in addition to a substantial loss of wealth.

The father's wisdom allowed him to release rather than restrain his son. The father's faith in his son's ability to deal constructively with pig pen reality had to be a contributing factor in letting him go. Is this comparable to the faith and trust Christ Jesus has in us to make constructive choices when we face the reality of a crisis? It's something to consider.

Crisis and Reality - Part 2

In the parable of the prodigal son Jesus relates how a young man, his older brother, and a father came face to face with reality. The younger son demanded that his father immediately give him his inheritance. Days later this young man sold his inheritance, packed his stuff, and left home. What do you think the father felt as his son walked out the door?

If your children have left home or are ready to do so, maybe you can identify somewhat with the ambivalence this parent felt experiencing his son's leaving home to find his way in the world. Leaving home takes determination, courage, and dreams. It's not whether you leave home, but what attitude motivates you to do so.

In this parable the young man left home with false assumptions that evolved into a life-threatening crisis. Someone said, "We cling dogmatically to our assumptions as long as possible." We often experience pain and suffering by acting on false assumptions. Yet God in his mercy helps us correct the plunge into crisis and return to the loving Father's love and forgiveness.

Crisis and Reality - Part 1

The word crisis from the Chinese language means opportunity or danger. Danger represents a potential change or loss from which great pain can be prolonged for years. Danger implies a potential crisis you're forced to face regardless of other choices you would rather make. Opportunity suggests positive choices with minimal stress.

The effectiveness with which we handle a crisis is connected to our ability to manage reality constructively. Ability includes a mentality for comprehending the seriousness of a given situation including a sense of what and who caused a crisis. Ability indicates skills that will be used to affect a productive change.

A personal crisis may come from neglecting our body, family, work, or other relationships. Constructively managing reality begins by giving Christ Jesus first place in your life. It means trusting him with every aspect of your life. When you activate this step, you're in a position to choose opportunities that advance God's purpose and plan for your life.

Choosing Reality: For Today and Tomorrow - Part 3

Eventually, just about everyone has to ask, "What is my purpose for occupying space on the planet?" For those who ask that question and receive even a partial answer, expectations for their lives usually change. As meaningful purpose is recognized, seized opportunities will, in all probability, become available for choosing.

Jesus told about a businessman who discovered a pearl of great value and immediately sold all his assets to buy it. He demonstrated a proactive mindset by taking the initiative to do what would change his life and secure his future. The man in the parable was looking for an opportunity of a lifetime.  Have you asked, "Where is my life going and why?"

Perhaps there have been severe disappointments that have narrowed your trust for change.  Jesus came to seek and save those who are lost and to bind up the wounds of the brokenhearted. Permitting him to heal your wounds and give new purpose and meaning for your life is definitely being receptive to a reality for positive change.  

Choosing Reality: For Today and Tomorrow - Part 2

Each of us has thought, "That may work in the movies, but not in reality." We may not like the face of reality, especially when it appears hard or unkind. Reality can be scary, challenging, and nerve-racking. However it can be calming and give its beholder a sense of hope and confidence for the future.

God gives us power to make decisions, to be creative, and to change. Power is a strange phenomenon. Once acquired, it's very difficult to give up. Power can become an addiction. John Dalberg-Acton observed, "Power tends to corrupt and absolute power corrupts absolutely." The healthiest use of power comes as we seek to share it with others.

The issue is not to seek more control and power in order to compensate for our limitations, but to trust that God is at work in our lives for our good. Psalm 62:8 confirms that we can go to God any time and pour out our hearts to him, for he is our refuge and hope for change. This is God's reality and the way for peace and confidence in a world that is ever-changing.