Why Is It So Hard to Let Go of the Past?

A clean slate should not be confused with totally eliminating the careless choices that impacted your body, mind, and spirit, including your relationships. God’s grace and mercy grant peace and the courage to prevent the past from dominating what God makes new for you.

The idea of showing mercy to oneself may seem impossible, but it deserves consideration. Think of it as refusing to ruminate on the past. Self-mercy includes forgiveness, turning over to God what transpired in the past that sometimes has seemed beyond resolving.

Personally extending mercy to oneself involves sincere repentance or turning from a lifestyle of self-indulgence or self-incrimination. 

Self-mercy permits God’s grace to establish a new mindset you live by each day that God will bless. Self-mercy acknowledges self-discipline that may be painful while God is at work to set you on a new path that’s filled with hope and his plan for your future. So praise God!                 

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I am convinced and confident of this very thing, that he who has begun a good work in you will [continue to] perfect and complete it until the day of Christ Jesus [the time of his return].

~Philippians 1:6 Amplified Bible

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Can Impulsive Decisions Be Corrected?

Have you ever made a decision on the spur of the moment that changed your life permanently? Impulsive acts may take place without any consideration for their positive or negative consequences. On the other side of acting impulsively is agonizing indefinitely over ever minute detail.

King Saul of Israel is an example of being impetuous – making rash, spontaneous statements and reckless decisions without considering future consequences. While Saul had many strengths, he often permitted his weaknesses to dominate his life.

Saul believed in God and often did what was good and right, but when he acted impulsively, he brought condemnation and regret onto himself. Seeking forgiveness from others and making restitution pleases God. 

Restoring fellowship with God is achieved by offering him a contrite and broken heart, and he in return gives you his grace and mercy. 

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My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

~Psalm 73:26 New International version

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Why Is It Important Never to Tolerate Evil?

Criticism is often linked to cynicism, primarily because of the negative attitudes of a person trying to cope with the pressures and stressors of life. Cynicism projects a distrust for the motives, goodness, or sincerity of others. Triggering cynicism is a sarcastic attitude.

The message of cynicism is that people are basically bad and the only way to cope with problems is through power struggles and criticism. In this mindset it’s obvious that criticism and cynicism produce unhappiness and trouble in what could be loving relationships.

An alternative to pessimism and criticism is seeking clear, positive corrections and solutions to a negative mindset. Listen, as Psalm 101:2 provides the option. “I will behave wisely and live a pure life. I will never tolerate evil.” 

God instructs us to model his grace and mercy in place of being critical or cynical, so be careful how you live.  

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Be very careful, then, how you live – not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.

~Ephesians 5:15-16 New International Version

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Can Grief Be the Main Healing Agent for Every Loss?

The word grief is often associated with the death of a loved one, a divorce, or whatever is considered a personal loss. Betrayal of trust may inflict emotional wounds that seems beyond grief’s ability to heal. Trust involves the emotional fabric for bonding and holding together important relationships.

Elizabeth Kubler Ross describes the stages of grief experienced by each person who faces a significant loss. First on the list is shock and disbelief, even denying the loss has occurred. Depression and  sadness form a stage that can last indefinitely. Bargaining, blaming, and anger also play major roles. Finally, the reality of the loss can no longer be denied, so acceptance makes facing the future possible.

Getting stuck in a particular stage is unhealthy and not in keeping with God’s purpose. He intended for grief to be the means for healing. So open your heart to him and permit his grace and mercy to heal you.   

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He is the healer of the brokenhearted. He is the one who bandages their wounds.

~Psalm 147:3 God’s Word Translation

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How Are Solutions for Anger Discovered?

When anger becomes intense, feelings of love and affection gradually diminish. The old cliché, “Love conquers all,” is true if anger is not used as a weapon to diminish another person’s self-image and integrity. Angry feelings signal emotional hurt and disappointment.

Continuously obsessing about anger rarely produces desired results but rather ratchets up anger to a higher level of intensity. Seldom is the trouble associated with anger resolved without teamwork and the help of the one to whom the anger is directed. When anger’s objective is to punish, it can destroy a relationship.

Solutions for anger are discovered by communication between the offender and the offended. It takes courage and God’s grace to approach either the offended or the offender. Ask God for self-control, courage, and the words to describe your hurt feelings. Refrain from condemning your offender by remaining in prayer until you have the grace and mercy to forgive.                   

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Happy are the kind and merciful, for they shall be shown mercy.

~Matthew 5:6 The Living Bible

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Confession Leads to Hope

It's been said that troubles come in batches, but for those whose hope is in the Lord God, grace and mercy are provided for withstanding the turmoil of the darkest night. However, for those who choose to be morally corrupt and live outside of what God will bless, pain and suffering are most often experienced as a consequence of living beyond God’s provision and protection.

What would prompt anyone to make such choices? Foolishness – along with a lack of faith, selfishness, and greed fed by wanting what’s beyond one’s financial, social, and spiritual boundaries. Another reason arises when the toil and burdens of life become overwhelming yet still must be endured.

What hope is there for those who permit corruption to fill their lives? God’s word tells us if we confess our sins, he forgives and cleanses us from all unrighteousness. Saint Augustine wrote, “The confession of evil works is the beginning of good works.” When confession is sincere, hope for God’s mercy and pardon are assured.  

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What happiness for those whose guilt has been forgiven! What joys when sins are covered over! What relief for those who have confessed their sins and God has cleared their record…Many sorrows come to the wicked, but abiding love surrounds those who trust in the Lord.  

~Psalm 32:1-2,10 The Living Bible

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A Bridge Built of Adversity

Adversity builds a bridge to strong character if you’re receptive to the lessons it teaches. This does not imply you should be happy that adversity is an integral part of your life. You can manage discouragement by following the instructions of St. Paul to put on the full armor of God and be prepared to fight the good fight of faith.

Although God gives us his words of encouragement, this fact is not easy to internalize. While God’s word was not available to Joseph, still he believed God was present to guide and direct him. Experience taught him adversity comes in varying degrees of intensity and duration and he would survive because God was with him.

Perhaps Joseph intuitively sensed God’s word from 2 Corinthians 7:4. "I am encouraged despite all my troubles, for my joy knows no bounds." Adversity builds a bridge to experiencing God’s grace and mercy, so as you realize God’s special purpose in the hardships you face, they become opportunities for experiencing God’s faithfulness.    

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So use every piece of God’s armor to resist the enemy whenever he attacks, and when it is all over, you will still be standing up.

But to do this, you will need the strong belt of truth and the breastplate of God’s approval. Wear shoes that are able to speed you on as you preach the Good News of peace with God. In every battle you will need faith as your shield to stop the fiery arrows aimed at you by Satan. And you will need the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit – which is the Word of God.

Pray all the time. Ask God for anything in line with the Holy Spirit’s wishes. Plead with him, reminding him of your needs, and keep praying earnestly for all Christians everywhere.

~Ephesians 6:13-18 The Living Bible

Beware of Evil, Prowling Lions

Opportunities that come our way can be to secure our betterment or to create a disaster. Some opportunities build bridges to prosperity, happiness and joy. Others build bridges to failure and suffering. After Joseph adjusted to life as a slave, his peace and comfort began to unravel when Potiphar’s wife began making sexual advances. 

Genesis 39:7 portrays her objective. “Come to bed with me.” Now listen to Joseph’s integrity. “My master has withheld nothing from me except you, because you are his wife. How then can I commit such wicked sin?” These attempts at seduction became more provocative and an endless temptation. 

          Being acutely aware of what God considered sin played a major role in helping Joseph keep his distance. He refused to permit his capacity for godly judgment to be over-shadowed by evil opportunities. Allow Joseph’s witness to inspire you to remain faithful to God’s grace and mercy. Choose to live only by standards that bring glory and honor to God.  

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Be careful – watch out for attacks from Satan, your great enemy. He prowls around like a hungry, roaring lion, looking for some victim to tear apart. Stand firm when he attacks. Trust the Lord, and remember that other Christians all around the world are going through these sufferings, too.

~1 Peter 5:8-9 The Living Bible

Faith: A Bridge to Survival

Jacob had a significant dream when he was running for his life. God promised him he would protect him, bless him, and bring him back to his homeland. Jacob believed God, which gave him confidence to endure the hard times that were to come his way. The power of faith God entrusted to Jacob built a bridge that guaranteed his survival.

Believing in your heart and mind that God is you friend, your redeemer and protector encourages a resilience that withstands defeat.  Laban, Jacob's father-in-law, changed his wages ten times over twenty years.  Each time they agreed on a wage Laban changed the rules, so Jacob was always indebted to him.

Jacob was assured of God’s faithfulness when in his dream God reminded him, "I am the God of Bethel where you built an altar and anointed it with oil in reverence to me and where you made vows to me. Now leave this land and return to your homeland.” God doesn't overlook our flaws, but sin’s penalty is superseded by his grace, his unmerited pardon, and his mercy.

Give Up Grabbing ~ Give In to God

It is not uncommon in friendships or a marriage relationship to feel slighted when it comes to giving and receiving. Jacob surely felt this way when he worked seven years for his future father-in-law for the privilege of marrying Rachel, his daughter. But the conniving, prospective father-in-law manipulated Jacob into working another seven years by hoodwinking him into first marrying Leah, his older daughter. 

          Jacob was a slick conniver who would take whatever he wanted by hook or crook without worrying that his schemes would turn against him. When he agreed to work seven years for Rachel, perhaps he believed his dreams were coming true. 

 

          Seven years is a long time to work for the woman he loved, but in doing so, it seemed he had control of the situation. Yet if he were to become God's man, a man reflecting God's grace and mercy, he would have to lose the arrogant attitude that dominated his life. God patiently and deliberately redeems those he chooses to carry out his purpose. 

Obstructions? Reality Check Required

Obstructions that seem to crowd each person's life journey can be fantasy smashers. No matter if you’re young and just beginning this journey or if you’ve been around awhile, obstacles become a major contender for blocking what you want to achieve. Every person has had hopes and dreams shattered by unexpected obstacles.

Jacob gladly agreed to work seven years for Rachel. However, his prospective father-in-law gave him Leah, Rachel's older sister. Jacob was tricked into marrying the woman he didn’t love. When Jacob discovered this deception, it was too late. For another seven years, he could only imagine the happiness he would share with Rachel.    

          Do you think Jacob ever connected on how Esau had felt when he conspired with their mother in a scheme to steal Esau’s blessing and birth right? The old saying of “what goes around, comes around” certainly showed up in this situation to give an accounting for sin. Yet the Lord God faithfully shows up with his grace and mercy that is greater than our sins.  

A Clear Path to a New Beginning

Jacob was not a man who made bad mistakes, but deliberately chose behaviors that set a course for his life. We’re aware of those who choose unethical, sinful and criminal activities and claim they were bad mistakes. The murderer of an elderly woman claimed that he never meant to cause pain and suffering, but the jury did not buy his “mistake” plea. 

          While Jacob was not a murderer, he did commit cold-hearted sins against his brother and father. The old cliché of “payday someday” caught up with him, causing him to flee for his life because Esau threatened to kill him. He was running to a safe place to hide, but in a strange, lonely place he had a dream that changed his life.

          In this dream God outlined a plan for Jacob that reflects God’s grace and mercy. God did not mention conditions for his willingness to bless Jacob. Have you been a recipient of such grace and mercy, including a clear pathway for a new beginning you never could have imagined? The impossible is possible with God.  

Redeeming Bad Choices - Part 2

The older brother in Jesus' story of the prodigal son could not accept his father's determination to integrate his wayward brother back into the family. This unglued his equilibrium to the degree that frustration, anger, and disbelief replaced the tranquility he knew when his brother was out of the picture.

The older brother had trouble accepting that his younger brother had a different personality and needed to live on the edge of discovery. Their father supported  the fact that his sons were different - one adventurous and immature, the other choosing to stay close to home and run the family business. Children need parents who respect differences and encourage them to pursue ambitions equivalent to their skills.

God's grace and mercy allow for mistakes and failure, as seen in both the younger and older sons. Unforgiven anger and unforgivable failure in ourselves or in others is the pathway to heartache and hardship. God requires that we forgive others, as he has forgiven us. This is clearly the pathway to inner peace. 

Rising Up, Finding Hope - Part 2

Everyday life presents challenges that demand reevaluation of past choices. Intense conflict or crisis requires determination to set in place a desirable outcome. Reframing necessitates being open to alternative behaviors and opinions in order for conflict to be managed successfully.

The prodigal son lost his way but made a decision that changed his life. Reframing meant visualizing an alternative to the abject poverty of his body and soul. Reframing gave him courage to rise up from shame and failure and find his way home. He found hope for his life in spite of the hardships he brought on himself.

Isn't it just like God to extend his grace and mercy to us, to supply answers to hard questions, and help us find our way back home? God gives us the will to face reality regardless of how that reality is defined. He gives insight for making choices that will change the downward spiral that your life is taking. Ask him to help you do this today.