Milestones of Commitment: Don't Turn Back! - Part 3

The fact that you’re alive indicates that faith and hope are possible for your future. There will be difficult times when circumstances require courage as you come to a crossroads where godly choices are critical. No matter how secure you feel nor how free from trouble you’ve been, life insures that changes will be required somewhere in the future.

Everyone has or will have crossroads experiences that challenge your purpose for living. Reaching a milestone is a point of departure from the old way and is indicative that real change is coming. Each developmental stage of life requires changes that cannot be avoided. While it's true that old, unhealthy attitudes can be retained, most people in time will discard these.

Maximizing a milestone experience requires being vulnerable to seeking God's best plan and then patiently waiting for his guidance. When your eyes, ears, heart, and mind are open and receptive, God will not be late or silent. It’s within God's character to respond to all who seek him, and he promises to be found. 

Created for Relationship - Part 3

An issue all marriages encounter is who is to be submissive to whom and to what degree. Equality includes equal power, different but equal roles, as well as opportunities to express the talents and skills each person brings to the relationship. Ephesians 5:21 offers this advice, "Submit one to another out of reverence for Christ."

What does the word accountability mean to you? Everyone has to answer to someone. Even gang members have this responsibility. Those who refuse face severe consequences. Most human beings comply with being accountable where assurance of personal safety exists. Submissiveness means more than yielding to the desires of another person.

In the healthiest sense, submissiveness means to be accountable to another person. The apostle Paul indicates that relationships should reflect our relationship with Christ Jesus. We are accountable to God for our behavior and our thoughts. God encourages us to consistently submit and be accountable to his kindness, love, and power.  

Created for Relationship - Part 1

Relationships are impossible to avoid because for most people, companionship is needed and desired. God knew Adam needed a soulmate to stave off feelings of isolation. Nothing in creation could meet his need for human companionship which included someone to enjoy and appreciate and who, in turn, would enjoy and appreciate him.

Ultimately, the most rewarding experience comes when you put aside your own needs so you can be for someone what only you can be at that moment. Society may teach you to take all you can get for yourself, even if it means great loss to others. With all you can grasp, empty feelings communicate exceptionally clear that something is still missing.

A popular song announced, “love isn’t love until you give it away” to someone who joyfully receives it. Only then will you experience a deep since of fulfillment. Philippians 2:7 tells us Christ Jesus emptied himself to demonstrate God's unconditional love for us. God will empower you to follow Jesus’ example.

Manage Conflict: Commit to Engage and Change - Part 1

A young man and woman in their late twenties, engaged to be married, decided to seek counseling before setting the wedding date. In the counselor's office, the future groom complained that his fiancée needed to discuss in minute detail every aspect of their wedding. She complained he would not talk about anything unless pushed to do so.

Conflict centered around communication styles and different needs. Trying to engage her fiancé in something other than surface talk created resistance, which caused the young woman to feel anxious and rejected. She, however, learned not to be put off by uncomfortable feelings. If important issues could not be resolved immediately, she learned to wait for a more opportune time.

Resilience is overcoming obstacles to reach an objective. When Jesus asked Peter three times if he loved him, he was seeking a commitment that Peter seemingly had trouble giving. Jesus was asking for more than a minimal commitment. He wanted Peter's complete loyalty, including his promise to be faithful. This is what Jesus is asking from us.  

Change, Challenge, and Convictions of Steel - Part 3

Engagement is a wonderful word most often referring to a couple's decision to make their relationship exclusive. Engagement means entering a covenant bond with promises regarding roles and behaviors to be honored for a lifetime. The integrity of each person entering this covenant bond affects the endurance of the relationship.

Engagement is an essential factor in communication. Engaging a person in conversation means more than exchanging words. It indicates two people are on the same track and their exchange of words is meaningful. To engage another person means to give value to that person, and it goes beyond words to give recognition to what another is feeling.

Resilience is related to staying on track rather than getting sidetracked. Jesus in John 21 demonstrated resilience with Peter when he asked him three times, "Peter do you love me?" Jesus was aware of the trials yet to be endured by Peter. He engaged and challenged Peter by asking for a commitment that would endure regardless of hardships yet to be faced.

Burned Out or Blessed? - Part 3

Jesus told a parable in Matthew thirteen about a farmer who went out to sow his seeds, which fell on four different types of soil. Imagine this farmer walking through his field sowing the seeds. Some seeds fell on a well-traveled path comprised of hard packed soil. These seeds had no chance to get planted, so birds came and ate them.

When work is seen as having little value except for a paycheck, feelings of stagnation eventually replace a positive attitude that made work endurable. What you bring to the work that God can use to influence others gives work a special purpose. If our attitude is centered only on a paycheck then encouragement will diminish like the seeds the birds ate.

Coming to terms with who you can be in Christ Jesus and how that is passed on to others can make a  difference in the value you place on work. You're  encouraged to be committed as if working for Christ Jesus, for he is at work to activate his good purpose in you. With this attitude, you can sow seeds that yield a good harvest.  

Allowing Intimacy: Getting Close - Part 2

Recently an elderly woman edging near despair made a startling statement. "I realize my whole life has been a sham!" She never intended to be deceptive, but now in the autumn of her years she's had no friends. Explaining further, she told of never permitting anyone get close. She had spent her whole life keeping others at a distance.

God created the family for each other. In his design, family members relate to one another with love, trust, and respect. This framework makes way for openness and honesty. This is not easy to accomplish, for it takes commitment, but the rewards far outweigh the loneliness and isolation of a life locked away from others and God.

No matter what your age, change is possible and can begin by taking a small step of faith to alter the way you live. The Lord Jesus Christ stands ready to help. Listen to Psalm 118:5-6. "In my anguish, I cried out to the Lord, and he answered me by setting me free. The Lord is with me; I will not be afraid." May God bless you today.

Choosing Commitment - Part 3

Alfred Lord Byron, the English poet, wrote that revenge is sweet. This attitude plays well in literature, but in relationships it creates disastrous consequences for all involved. The need for revenge negatively affects the spirit and soul of the one harboring such feelings. Revenge can be acted out in hateful, destructive behavior or by passive aggressive isolation.

The drive for retribution originates from hurt and anger and is often directed toward someone you trusted and loved. It can be directed toward a stranger who brought pain and suffering into your life. Getting past this destructive mindset requires honest self-evaluations. Ask yourself, “What have I got to lose by letting go of this need for revenge? What do I gain by giving it up?”

The answer is freedom to live in peace. God's Word asserts, “Revenge is mine. I will repay says the Lord.” Jesus reminds you to seek the truth and it will set you free. God invites you to forgive as he in Christ Jesus has forgiven you, and that is indeed a godly choice. 

Choosing Commitment - Part 2

In a recent movie, a social worker tells a young girl whose life is in disarray that she can choose not to run away - she can choose to co-operate and try to make her life better. The social worker informs her she can choose to control her anger, which becomes possible as she learns to trust others to meet of her physical and emotional needs.

Some people's lives follow a pattern of disarray because of impulsive decisions. These choices bring unfortunate consequences. Anger can get a foothold and become the basis for life’s decisions, leading to disaster. In the movie, this young girl chooses to give up her fear and anger for a chance to be accepted and loved by a foster family.

Refusing to be controlled by negative emotions like fear and anger is an important doable decision. You can also decide to trust in God’s Word. Jeremiah 29:11 is a trustworthy promise: “For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Trust is a choice that produces positive change. 

Choosing Commitment - Part 1

How well do you take care of yourself? While some problems we encounter in life are not of our choosing, most come about as the result of our own decisions. How we take care of ourselves, physically, mentally and spiritually, determines success or failure. Deciding to exercise helps maintain a healthy body and mind. Sometimes we start off with good intentions, but those good intentions may slip away.  

Connected to any decision is commitment. To commitment there must be a doable plan in place for reaching a specific goal. St. Paul said, “I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me.” To press onward is a choice bound up in commitment.

God intended for us to take care of ourselves because our body, mind and spirit comprise a temple for the Holy Spirit. How well you care for yourself depends on your motivation. God loves you and sacrificed for you to give you life abundantly! It’s not about feeling guilty, but rather feeling worthy because God has chosen you.