Waiting for Trust to Return

Relationships survive and thrive on love, trust, and respect. Someone said, "I love him, but I can't trust him." Or, "I love her, but I've lost respect for her." Trust and respect can be rebuilt when each person is patient and honest enough for change and healing to evolve. Patience depends on basic love to endure the hardships of waiting.

When trust has been destroyed, trust for a person may not return, even after forgiveness has taken place.  While forgiveness is a crucial step in restoring trust, it doesn't mean a person is ready or willing to trust again. You may want to trust, wish you could, but find it difficult to rise to the occasion.

Human nature forces us to wait and see if a person is trustworthy. Letting down your guard and gradually beginning to trust again depends on the assurance of safety. Basic love provides hope for a return to trust. Romans 12:12 instructs us to "be joyful in hope, patient in affliction and faithful in prayer." These three are necessary for rebuilding a relationship.

Waiting to Compete

Humans were designed to compete and struggle to make their mark on the world. When we can't be a viable competitor, we choose heroes from all areas of life to compete for us. Sports figures become heroes, so we compete through them. Siblings often compete for recognition, acceptance and dominance.

The simultaneous marriages of Jacob to sisters Rachel and Leah created a situation that was a perfect setup for rivalry. Jacob loved Rachel, but Leah could have children while Rachel remained barren. It wasn't enough that Jacob loved Rachel. She felt unfulfilled as a woman compared to Leah, who gave Jacob four sons.

My aunt was unable to have children and half-jokingly asked my mother to give her my sister. My aunt was intelligent, attractive, had a loving husband and a career, but that was not enough. It takes faith and patience to wait, to endure, to persist. God’s desire is to give these attributes to you as you open your heart to receive him.