What Makes Serving Others Joyful?

The idea of being a servant has fallen out of favor today regardless of social status. Being served by others is more acceptable, for it conveys authority, power, and privilege. However we do serve others, whether at home, work, or play.

Serving can be a joyful experience that delights the heart and soul, or it can produce an attitude of resentment and contempt. Whichever attitude is present depends on self-perception. Do I see myself as above serving others because entitlement confers on me the right to be served?

Jesus made it absolutely clear he came into the world to serve and to give his life to redeem mankind. Jesus obviously saw a higher purpose in serving others, and that higher purpose was to please God. Think of being a servant as laying up treasures in heaven where the rewards are eternal. If being a servant was preferable to Jesus, then it must be good and honorable. 

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And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. 

~2 Timothy 2:24 New International Version

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What Draws People Closer in a Relationship?

Whatever shapes a relationship and determines its success or failure is directly attributed to words that are spoken in conjunction with a positive or negative mood. It’s possible to temporarily disguise feelings and thoughts, but eventually and predictably, the truth will be revealed.

Some people would never disguise their thoughts or mood even as they realize these thoughts and feelings, if expressed, would damage the relationship. While this approach hides dangerous pent-up emotions, they contribute to a sad, depressed mood that pushes people away.

Conversely, feelings which are joyful, confident, and peaceful exemplify a mood of contentment that draws people closer to each other. 

In life we have a choice of being a peacemaker or an alienator, to expect and live with hope for the future or become engulfed in negative thoughts and moods. Jesus said, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called God’s own people.” What a blessed position to share with those you love!           

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Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

~1 Thessalonians 5:16 New International Version

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How Does Expressing Kindness Affect Acceptance?

Being accepted is one of the highest achievements mankind strives for throughout life. Acceptance depends on several contributing facts such as character, social skills, education, and a multitude of other factors. 

We’re born into a family where acceptance should be a given, but one child can be more favored than others, depending on gender and birth order. While children are not overtly rejected, one may be more favored.

The content of all emotional attachments is communicated by affection and joyful feelings expressed toward each child. Your feelings, whether positive or negative, represent acceptance or rejection.

Proverbs 11:12 confirms: “It’s foolish to speak scornfully of others.” The word 'scornful' describes an attitude of judgment and a hateful mood. Listen to Proverbs 11:17. “You do yourself a favor when you are kind….”  Remember, wise people think before speaking, and being kind promotes acceptance. Praise God for the kindness he demonstrates to us.

It is a  treasure to cherish.   

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So in Christ Jesus all of you are children of God through faith, for all of you who were baptized have clothed yourself with Christ.

~Galatians 3:26 Williams – New Testament in the Language of the People

Now therefore there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

~Romans 8:1 Williams – New Testament in the Language of the People

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How Does Our Mood Affect What We Say?

The words we say to another person in stressful situations can permanently damage a relationship. Words reflect moods such as happy, joyful, sad, or angry. These feelings are identifiable by the tone of voice and facial expressions.

Mistakes are often accompanied by a mood such as anger or fear. Words spoken carelessly while in a particular mood may reveal what is actually factual but, once spoken, are forever imprinted in the mind of the one who hears.

Regardless of your mood, you are accountable for every word spoken. 

So, it’s not always appropriate to say what we think and feel. While mistakes are forgivable, they can have a permanent, negative impact. Proverbs 10:17 are words for the wise: “People who listen when they are corrected will live, but those who will not admit that they are wrong are on a dangerous pathway.” God’s word is the pathway to life and peace.

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Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

~Psalm 139:23-24 New International Version

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Are We Responsible for Learning from Mistakes?

It is amazing how past mistakes shape what we presently choose. Corrected mistakes can be responsible for choices that paved the way for success and happiness. What ultimately mattered is how accountability influenced a final outcome.

In our society divorce has come to be an acceptable solution for a bad marriage. What’s interesting to note is over 60% of those entering a second marriage fail to make a better choice. Is this a by-product of failing to learn from previous mistakes?

You are responsible for learning from mistakes and applying new knowledge to current situations. How does God feel observing his people making poor choices in the face of unmistakable warning signs? Proverbs 27:12 makes this observation: “Sensible people will see trouble coming and avoid it, but an unthinking person will walk right into it and later regret it.” 

Listen to the still small voice of God as he speaks to you now.

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Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you – unless, of course, you fail the test?

~2 Corinthians 13:5 New International Version

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How Do We Learn from Past Mistakes?

Have you known someone who refused to take responsibility to do a special task out of fear of making a mistake that they assumed would be unforgivable? Mistakes are a vital component to learning in addition to being a primary source for understanding what to avoid in the future.

Learning from mistakes is linked to accountability, which in turn is connected to maturing throughout life. In the American Civil War of the 1860’s Robert E. Lee, commander of the Southern forces, made a choice that led to his defeat at Gettysburg.

For Lee, it was a lesson too late for learning, but for most people it is not too late to learn from bad choices. 

God promises if you accept accountability, he will give you knowledge and understanding that enable you to change your life’s pathway. Accountability means learning from mistakes, taking responsibility for them, and then applying corrective action to ensure they will not be repeated.  

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Whoever conceals their sins will not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy.

~Proverbs 28:13 New International Version

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Does God Use Past Mistakes as Guides for the Future?

Making a mistake is unavoidable, yet essential for maturing. Acquiring knowledge takes place in formal education, and experience serves as a valuable learning tool. Accountability acknowledges mistakes and poor judgment and then implements corrections.

Mistakes are forgivable, provided they serve as teaching moments. Each person is accountable for gaining knowledge and being sure that what is learned is valuable. Proverbs 15:31 defines a wise person: “If you pay attention when you are corrected, you are wise”.

Edward Wilson was one of Harvard University’s prestigious professors and known for his research on ants. He accepted criticism by putting into action suggestions from his critics that resulted in his greatest discoveries. Knowledge and wisdom can be late in coming, but where there is dedication to learning, God will  bestow his grace and blessings on that person. 

You can do great things through Christ Jesus who gives you strength and courage to press on toward accomplishing what he sets before you to do.

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Take a lesson from the ants…Learn from their ways and be wise! For though they have no leader or ruler, they store up their food during the summer, getting ready for winter… Listen! Wisdom is calling out. Reason is making [itself known].  

~Proverbs 6:6-8, 8:1 The Living Bible/Good News Bible

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What Are the Consequences for Unacceptable Behavior?

How often have you heard someone say in frustration or despair, “I just want to be myself and be accepted?” In truth, you must restrain the impulse to act with unacceptable behavior and objectionable speech, for this is the pathway to rejection.

Understanding accountability and applying it to yourself is a tremendous task, but the majority of people will in time mature. The message is clear: “You can be yourself but within specified boundaries.”

You have an expressive self that is part of your identity and an internal core that’s also yearning for exposure. Restraining is necessary to prevent unwanted negative consequences. Accountability is certain, so your objective is to please God with your whole self. Proverbs 16:23 offers wise counsel. “Intelligent people think before they speak, so what they say is then more persuasive.” 

In Jesus you have your best example for who you can be and what you can do.

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Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful.

~1 Corinthians 4:2 New International Version

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Are Your Expectations Realistic?

The health of a relationship is as dependent on words spoken as it is on actual conduct. There are instances where behavior speaks louder than words. Your behavior gives evidence that words either were spoken in truth or stand as a contradiction to truth and honor.

Character and your identity cannot be separated from the quality of your vocabulary. An old cliché stands in judgment for speaking without thinking. Perhaps you’ve heard it. “Speak in haste and repent in leisure.” So...

Have you regretted speaking in anger or thoughtlessness?

Accepting accountability has positive rewards for those who permit it to guard their lives. Proverbs 2:7 affirms God’s response to those who are committed to being accountable: “He holds victory in store for the upright; He is a shield to those whose walk is blameless, for he guards the course of the just and protects the way of the faithful.” What does God expect from you and me?

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Here is the new agreement I, the Lord, will make with my people…. “I will write my laws on their hearts and minds. I will be their God and they will be my people.”

~Jeremiah 31:33 Contemporary English Version

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Does Accountability Include Words Spoken and How We Live?

Accountability is difficult to feel comfortable with because everyone has acted irresponsibly. Who hasn’t spoken disparagingly about another person’s behavior or character when it was unwarranted? It’s amazing what words can be spoken in moments of reckless intent.

It’s frightening to realize we will be held accountable for every word we speak. In Psalm 141:3 David recognized the implications of reckless speech: “Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord: keep watch over the door to my lips. Let not my heart be drawn to what is evil.”

One of the Ten Commandments specifically states, “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor or accuse anyone falsely.” David was aware that he would be held accountable for the words he spoke and for living an honorable life before God. “May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.” That’s a request God will honor.

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For we must all appear before the judgement seat of Christ, so that each of us may receive what is due us for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad. 

~2 Corinthians 5:10 New International Version

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How Does Correcting a Child's Behavior Affect Self-esteem?

What is accountability and how does it rank in importance to the development of character and self-esteem? Parents want their children to have adequate self-esteem so they will be able to achieve to the level of their intellectual and social capabilities.

Critical to being accountable is acquiring emotional and social maturity appropriate to each stage of development. Listen to Proverbs 22:6: “Teach children how to live, to do what is right and good in all situations, and it will be their model for life.” 

Some parents mistakenly believe correcting children’s behavior and mistakes will damage their self-esteem. However failure to correct them will send children into the world ill-prepared for success. The world will not coddle a person who refuses to comply with society’s rules for living. 

It’s imperative to teach your children God’s way for living as they can grasp it’s meaning and purpose. Then be their role model. 

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For in the gospel a righteousness from God is revealed, a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: “The righteous shall live by faith.”

~Romans 1:17 New International Version

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Do Words Have Power to Determine Your Destiny?

What you say and how you act are important for those who practice maturity and good judgment in all of life’s situations. Accountability means to assume responsibility for every word spoken, for every deed and how these influence others.

 Accountability is an awesome word, for it points directly to character, integrity and honesty. Recently at the grocery store, the customer in front of me was incorrectly given ten dollars too much change.

The customer immediately returned the money to the young store employee, who was dismayed by the customer’s integrity and honesty. Romans 14:11-12 speaks to the issue of accountability: “‘As surely as I am the living God,’ says the Lord, ‘everyone will kneel before me, and everyone will confess that I am God.’ Every one of us then will have to give an account to God.” The words we speak and how we act determine our destiny. That’s something to think about and then make needed changes.  

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…From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked. ~Luke 12:48b New International Version

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