The Awful Truth of Favoritism

Jacob was his mother’s favorite son, so he set up the same system with Joseph, his firstborn son with Rachel. The favoritism Jacob felt is stated in Genesis 37:3: “Now Jacob loved Joseph more than any of his other sons and made him a beautiful ornate coat.” Jacob’s prejudice caused hatred and resentment to intensify between Joseph and his brothers. Hatred and resentment nourished by envy give rise to strife and alienation. 

Try to imagine parents today giving their youngest son or daughter an expensive sports car after passing down used family sedans to their older children. This favorite son or daughter is given credit cards while the older children work to pay for gas, insurance and repairs. 

Displaying favoritism hurts everyone. The favorite child often suffers from being indulged. If this child has a conscience, guilt will be an issue because he or she knows it isn't right. Parents have the responsibility to love their children with impartiality. God is impartial with us, so parents are summoned to follow his example.

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Parents, do not treat your children in such a way as to make them angry. Instead, raise them with Christian discipline and instruction.

~EPHESIANS 6:4 Good News Bible

If you really keep the royal law found in Scripture, “Love your neighbor as yourself,” you are doing right. But if you show favoritism, you sin and are convicted by the law as lawbreakers.

~JAMES 2:8-9 New International Version

Playing Favorites

When Jacob returned to his homeland, he arrived with a new name that reflected an encounter with God. Rachel, the wife he dearly loved, died after giving birth to Benjamin. She had prayed for a second son, so Joseph could have a full brother. Jacob had twelve other children, so Benjamin was born when he was past sixty years of age.

However, it was Joseph, his first-born son with Rachel, who became his favorite. Genesis 37:3 explains: "Now Jacob loved Joseph more than any of his other sons because he had been born in his old age."  Favoritism exposes a special bonding between parent and child but can create resentment and hatred in the other siblings.

The negative fallout for the favored child may be a lack of maturity in relating to others. Joseph either was unable to detect the anger in his older brothers or simply flaunted his status as the favorite son. God's love is unconditional and excludes favoritism. He expects us to be a model of his character.  

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Peter fairly exploded with his good news: “It’s God’s own truth, nothing could be plainer: God plays no favorites! It makes no difference who you are or where you’re from – if you want God and are ready to do as he says, the door is open.

~ACTS 10:34-35 The Message

My brothers and sisters, believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ must not show favoritism.

~JAMES 2:1 New International Version