What Does Excuse-making Say About Maturity?

Coming up with excuses for failure is not difficult to do. Parents blame the school, teachers, or other students sometimes for their child’s failures. There are situations where excuses have validity, but blaming others doesn’t always adequately address reality.

Excuse-making is a first defense for failure. We want to be well thought of even if it means failing to take responsible for failures to live up to expectations. Looking good may substitute for poor parenting skills, a failed marriage, and how we want God to see us.

Looking good often covers a fractured self and is often an excuse for failure. Remember when Adam and Eve had to face God for choosing to eat the forbidden fruit? Adam excused himself by blaming Eve, and Eve’s excuse was Satan persuaded her with enticing words. Rather than making up excuses to cover their guilt and shame, they could have, through open and truthful confession, presented themselves honestly to God. 

God honors honesty.                    

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Let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled with the blood of Christ to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess.

~Hebrews 10:22-23 New International Version

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What Is the Primary Source for Joyful Living?

Family gatherings, for whatever occasion, elicit expectations that range from happiness and joy to anxiety or even a sense of dread. So much depends on the maturity level of each family member and the degree to which old conflicts and disagreements have been resolved.

Being willing to permit past troubles to remain hidden so peace can abound is possible. Accept the fact that each person has the potential to grow and mature with passing years and responsibilities. Instead of focusing on the past, ask God to help you see the person now before you who has matured.

Remind yourself that joy is found in loving fellowship with family and friends. Joy comes most abundantly in our union with the Lord Jesus Christ, who makes expressions of love and joy possible. Keep your expectations centered on God’s presence in you, so his peace can fill your heart and soul.                     

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Let us come near God with pure hearts and a confidence that comes from having faith. Let’s keep our hearts pure, our consciences free from evil….as we must hold tightly to the hope that we say is ours [in Christ Jesus].

~Hebrews 10:22-23 Contemporary English Version

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God's Forgiveness Will Cleanse Your Conscience

I recently heard someone ask, "How can I forgive others when I can't forgive myself?" That question is troublesome because it’s laced with shame and guilt. What makes it difficult to forgive oneself is a sense of unworthiness. Unrelenting feelings of guilt and shame may produce behaviors that unintentionally cause damage to a relationship.

 

Inadvertently hurting or betraying someone and then saying their pain and suffering is inconsequential inflicts additional pain that makes forgiveness more difficult. Self-punishment is powered by the wrong belief that it will dissolve shame and guilt. However, sincerely making amends or apologizing is God’s way to a clear conscience. 

Self-forgiveness follows knowing and accepting the cleansing power of God's forgiveness. God's forgiveness is available to anyone who turns to Christ Jesus in faith confessing their sins and behaviors that separated them from fellowship with God and others. Committing to these steps will make it possible for you to forgive yourself and others.  

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If we confess our sins, He is to be depended on, since He is just, to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from every wrong.

~1 John 1:9 Williams – New Testament in the Language of the People

So let us come near to God with a sincere heart and a sure faith, with hearts that have been purified from a guilty conscience and with bodies washed with clean water. Let us hold on firmly to the hope we profess, because we can trust God to keep his promise.

~Hebrews 10:22-23 Good News Bible

Becoming a Person of Faith

When Jacob left his home to escape the wrath of his brother Esau, his work habits would change dramatically though he would remain a manipulator. For twenty years he managed his father-in-law’s livestock. Now he was ready to make the six hundred-mile trek back home, but he expected to be rewarded for those twenty years of hard work.

As he prepared to leave, he planned to swindle his father-in-law and felt justified to do so. For twenty years he had developed the skill of breeding livestock and had used that skill for his benefit. He proposed to take every specifically colored animal with him back to his homeland as payment for his labor.

Jacob’s plan was to outwit his father-in-law, who had taken advantage of his management skills for twenty years. However, God had placed Jacob in a position where he would be manipulated for someone else's benefit. God’s purpose for Jacob was for him to change, to grow and become a man of faith so he could be a true blessing to others.