Communication Gatekeeper: Protector of Relationships

It’s impossible to agree with everything we hear due to personality differences, our religious and political views, and our perception of the world. In our closest relationships, disagreements are expected, but whether they evolve into conflict depends on the effectiveness of the gatekeeper’s influence and power over our emotions.

The gatekeeper, identified as the voice of conscience enhanced by the Holy Spirit, should provide alternatives to negative communications that could cause a relationship breakup. The purpose of the gatekeeper is to determine what is acceptable for healthy communications and the overall good of a relationship.

Proverbs 18:1 offers this reminder: "People who do not get along with others are interested only in themselves; they will disagree with what everyone else knows is right." A principle for effective communications is to make sure the highest level of integrity is maintained in language and motives. This pleases the Lord God. 

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Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.

~Proverbs 21:23 English Standard Version

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When Communications Collapse

Problems with communication are a phenomenon each individual will ultimately experience. Every relationship will eventually reach an impasse where communications break down.  An impasse occurs when a relationship becomes so emotionally charged, all motivation for rational discussion collapses.

When two strong-willed personalities are unwilling to admit bad judgement, a breakdown in communication follows suit. These individuals believe such an admission implies weakness or inferiority. Actually, honesty and truthfulness show integrity and strength of character, which prevent an impasse from taking place.

Proverbs 29:11 discourages permitting anger to evolve into rage, which destroys communications. Preventing a communication impasse begins with asking God for wisdom and applying that wisdom to accept the other person's perspective. As we seek forgiveness and reconciliation, the Lord Jesus Christ provides mercy for making that possible. 

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Deliver me, O Lord, from deceitful lips, from a lying tongue. What shall be given to you, and what more shall be done to you, you deceitful tongue?

~Psalm 120:2-3 English Standard Version

 Watch your words and hold your tongue; you’ll save yourself a lot of grief.   

~Proverbs 21:23 The Message 

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