Face the Truth to Avoid a Crisis

Becoming saturated with conflict is a sad-but-true reality for many couples and families. In some cases, conflict isolates those involved from love and affection and will possibly generate emotional stagnation. When a relationship becomes stagnant from relentless striving, love and affection between the participants become stale and impure.

What’s difficult to accept is that conflict doesn't necessarily have to be bad. While most people dislike conflict, it can provide the pathway for discovering the truth about others and oneself. Unhealthy conflict refuses to face personal and relationship problems. It seems easier to let stagnation dominate than to face changes or an uncertain future.

When relationships become frozen in conflict, a potential crisis may shatter the lives of all involved. However, God desires for you to face the truth even when a resolution seems beyond achieving. Facing the truth is anxiety producing, but with God nothing is impossible because he cares more for you than you could ever imagine.  

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My child, don’t turn away or become bitter when the Lord corrects you. The Lord corrects everyone he loves, just as parents correct their favorite child.

~Proverbs 3:11-12 Contemporary English Version

Better to correct someone openly than to let him think you don’t care for him at all. Friends mean well, even when they hurt you. 

~Proverbs 27:5-6 Good News Bible

Giving an honest answer is a sign of true friendship.

~Proverbs 24:26 Contemporary English Version

And I pray that Christ will make his home in your hearts through faith. I pray that you may have your roots and foundation in love.
~Ephesians 3:17 Good News Bible

Reflections of Christ in You

A line from a popular song expressed this truth, "People who need people are the luckiest people in the world." We could add, people who have a forgiving attitude are the happiest people, for God has given them peace. Anyone who is forgiving has it within their heart and soul to practice the virtue of goodness.

The Talmud, a collection of rabbinical writings that date from the first century, lists seven virtues that minister before the Throne of God. These virtues are: Wisdom, Justice, Righteousness, Kindness, Compassion, Truth and Peace.  The implication is that those who practice these virtues do so with God’s highest approval.

It's important to remember that as one of these virtues is put into action, it reflects the character of all the others. Jesus teaches in Matthew 12:35 that “a good man brings out the good stored up in himself.” Keep in mind that if forgiveness is to play a major role in your relationships, it must reflect the goodness made possible by Christ Jesus in you.  

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Open your mouth and taste, open your eyes and see – how good God is. Blessed are you who run to him.

~Psalm 34:8 The Message

For God took the sinless Christ and poured into him our sins. Then, in exchange, he poured God’s goodness into us!

~2 Corinthians 5:21 The Living Bible

And I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts, living within you as you trust in him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God’s marvelous love.

~Ephesians 3:17 The Living Bible

Power Struggles: Choose to Step Back - Part 1

Power struggles are common in relationships. Married couples sometimes fight over what seem to be insignificant matters. However on closer examination, the issue is, who rules what and how much? Grappling for position, salary, and privileges at work also is common practice. The end result can be serious conflict that damages relationships.

The father of a teenage daughter related how he became embroiled in a huge power struggle with her. Looking back, the issue that sparked the fire was minor. Some said it was basic adolescent rebellion striving for independence while others contended the father was too controlling and failed to trust her with what she was striving to obtain.

Stepping back from a power struggle permits you to consider Ephesians 3:17. "I pray that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have power to grasp how wide, long and deep is the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge." Trusting in the power of Christ's love gives you the ability to communicate with reason. This is a choice you can make.