What's the Purpose of Healthy, Productive Anger?

A state of anger exists when individuals embrace indiscriminate power to hurt and alienate those who should be loved and respected. When anger is turned loose in an emotionally charged setting, the objective is to damage those responsible for the problems.

For some, this defines justifiable anger, but it comes from a person who’s determined to protect and defend their vulnerable self. For that person, anger is now rationalized as an offensive measure designed to get even by means of punishment. Anger and punishment then embrace each other as allies.

Healthy, productive anger management, however, determines to use this powerful emotion for creating solutions for all involved. Listen to Psalm 85:10: “Love and faithfulness will meet; righteousness and peace will embrace. Human loyalty will reach up from the earth, and God’s righteousness will reach down from heaven” to those who determine to be peacemakers. Will you? 

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A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire. ...God doesn’t miss a thing – he’s alert to good and evil alike. Kind words heal and help; cutting words wound and maim.

~Proverbs 15:1,3-4 The Message

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Christ, a Calming Voice in Our Storms

Conflict is a normal part of living within hurried lifestyles that allocate little time for listening to and understanding one another. People draw close where there is time for fun, communication and opportunities to get to know each other. Yet over time, unresolved conflict may systematically diminish the effort to build unity of heart and soul.

Although conflict exists between family members, it should not become destructive. Make a covenant with family members that disputes will be settled to benefit everyone involved. Take responsibility early for anger and frustration because these powerful emotions become fuel to set off emotional explosions.

Identify these feelings and their root cause. This is God’s way for managing disputes rather than demeaning or criticizing others. Proverbs 15:18 reminds us that “Hot tempers stir up strife but being slow to anger calms a dispute.” Ask each family member to propose resolutions to problems. Be open to viewing others as God sees them. 

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A gentle answer turns away wrath, but harsh words cause quarrels. The Lord is watching everywhere and keeps his eye on both the evil and the good. Gentle words cause life and health; griping brings discouragement.

~Proverbs 15:1,3-4 The Living Bible

Jesus got up and ordered the wind and the waves to be quiet. The wind stopped, and everything was calm. Jesus asked the disciples, “Why were you afraid? Don’t you have any faith?”

~Mark 4:39-40 Contemporary English Version