Concealment and withholding are effective
tools for potentially controlling what happens in a relationship. Suppose your
feelings were hurt in a conversation, but you were afraid to reveal your wound
so you remained silent. This is a common conflict avoidance practice,
especially if you’re fearful of appearing weak or ridiculous.
Concealment
of hurt feelings builds a bridge to anger and sadness. Note that concealment of
hurt or sad feelings often transforms into withholding affection and
intimacy. Withholding is a defense device used to protect yourself from further
exposure to hurt, plus a passive means of punishing another person for hurting
your feelings.
Jesus gave
you this encouragement: “If you have an issue with someone, go to that person
and openly address the problem.” What makes this so hard is the risk of being
hurt again, but to do so frees you of what you’re concealing and potentially
builds a bridge to the future God has already prepared for you. Ask Christ Jesus
for courage.
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