When
conflict dominates a relationship, distress may eventually evolve into
vindictiveness. The longer conflict exists, the more it fuels the fire of
vindictiveness, which can diminish any appearance of love and compassion for significant
others. Vindictiveness has the power to prolong a stubborn, self-willed
attitude that perpetuates conflict.
An attitude of
vindictiveness can be healed by making a concerted effort to listen and
understand another’s point of view. Proverbs 3:13 states: "Blessed is the man who finds wisdom and who gains understanding.”
This is also a step to forgiveness and a possible new beginning. Is this your desire?
Hatred stirs up
trouble; love overlooks the wrongs that others do.
~Proverbs 10:12 Contemporary
English Version
This love of
which I speak is slow to lose patience – it looks for a way of being constructive.
It is not possessive: it is neither anxious to impress nor does it cherish
inflated ideas of its own importance.
Love has good
manners and does not pursue selfish advantage. It is not touchy. It does not
keep account of evil or gloat over the wickedness of other people. On the
contrary, it shares the joy of those who live by the truth.
Love knows no
limit to its endurance, no end to its trust, no fading of its hope; it can
outlast anything. Love never fails.
~1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Phillips – New Testament in Modern English
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