“Why do I always get blamed for all of our problems and troubles?” Could that be your predicament? Or perhaps you’re the one blaming and criticizing. Either way, your relationship is destined for trouble. A creative step for freeing yourself from this type of communicating is to realize it’s a habit that can be broken.
Criticism is defended by insinuating incorrectly that it's beneficial. Accusations and criticism portray a person who feels threatened, but it takes honesty and integrity to admit this is true. Criticism is used to deflate another person's self-esteem, but hurling criticism damages one's own integrity and self-respect.
It's possible to move creatively beyond this type of relating by seeing others as being created in God's image and deserving kindness and respect. In Psalm 40 David gives his testimony: "The Lord God lifted me out of a slimy pit. He gave me a new song to sing." God will lift you out of that same pit if you ask him. Why not do it?
Love must be completely sincere. Hate what is evil, hold
on to what is good. Love one another warmly as Christians, and be eager to show
respect for one another.
~Romans 12:9-10 Good News Bible
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