Finding
a companion for marriage that lasts a lifetime is an endeavor that begins in
late adolescence because God created us for attachment, commitment, and
compatibility. Without compatibility, a rift develops that keeps closeness and intimacy
in the shadows while creating an atmosphere for continuous power struggles. Intimacy
based on trust and acceptance is out of step with power struggles.
Pretending to accept what is
incompatible with your values is dishonesty and a refusal to face the truth. Honesty
has the courage to verbalize your real self to others. Don't pretend to go
along with behaviors just to get others to accept you. Dishonesty will come
back to haunt you in the form of power struggles and possible abandonment.
Choosing
honesty by disclosing what you know to be your authentic self is what God intends.
You can trust God's word for help from Psalm 18:32. "It is God who arms me
with strength and makes my way perfect." Believe me, God will make a way
and a perfect time for you to express who you are. Honesty makes way for
genuine intimacy and peace.
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