Is There a Productive Way to Express Anger?

Unresolved anger builds a wall between individuals who might love and care for each other. This wall may be unheeded initially but in time will create a barrier that appears impossible to penetrate. Anger can become layered in when there is no attempt to resolve issues that trigger this emotion.

Each eruption of anger can weaken the bond of trust. This is unfortunate because there’s a healthier way to manage an emotion that’s impossible to avoid. Some believe anger is the most convenient means for controlling situations and people, but this perception ignores the destructive nature of anger.

God’s anger as portrayed in Psalm 30:5 lasts only a moment, which implies anger is unavoidable but can be resolved immediately. Ask yourself, “Is the way I express anger productive or does it drive others away.” With God’s guidance and insight, walls created by anger can be dismantled.                

___________ 

Stop being bitter and angry and mad at others. Don’t yell at one another or curse each other or ever be rude. Instead, be kind and merciful, and forgive others, just as God forgave you because of Christ.

~Ephesians 4:31-32 Contemporary English Version

___________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week. 

Can Irrational Anger Be Managed?

Expressing anger can produce positive or negative results. The outcome is based not on whether anger is justified but on whether it is expressed in a rational way that can generate helpful solutions. Irrational anger damages relationships. David’s family experienced his irrational anger more than ever when it was empowered by alcohol.

On one occasion David reduced to rubble their furniture, electronics, and the children’s toys. That outburst of destructive anger separated him permanently from his family. No cries of regret could persuade his wife and children to return home. All trust and respect had been replaced with fear.

This result is not uncommon for irrational anger. Listen to James 1:20. “Everyone must be quick to listen and slow to speak, for anger will not result in the righteousness God desires.” There is help for out-of-control anger. God will give you the strength to be honest and to pursue help for this destructive affliction. 

                    

___________ 

The Lord is near to everyone who prays to him, to every faithful person who prays to him. He fills the needs of those who fear him. He hears their cries for  help and saves them.  

~Psalm 145:18-19 God’s Word Translation

___________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week.

What Gives a Gentle Voice Power?

Anger is most often attributed to someone or something beyond ourselves instead of accepting that its source lies within us. Susan discovered that the cleaners had misplaced or lost her clothes once again. For the first time, she did not go into a fit of rage, threatening to make the owner pay.

Anger is a defensive response but often is acted out aggressively. Losing her clothes meant Susan must wear either casual or dressy clothes to work, which would attract the negative attention of her supervisor. Susan’s only option was to tell the truth and express regret for what was beyond her control.

Proverbs 15:1 reminds us that a gentle voice turns away wrath in others and within oneself. The manager of the cleaners agreed to replace her clothes if they could not immediately be found. God’s way ultimately produces positive results, so let the peace of God rule in your heart and mind and be thankful you have this wonderful power within you.

___________ 

A soft and gentle and thoughtful answer turns away wrath, but harsh and painful and careless words stir up anger.

~Proverbs 15:1 Amplified Bible 

___________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week.  

Can You Conquer Anger?

Anger is responsible for as much heartache and trouble as is any other emotion. While anger by itself is not a bad emotion, behaviors linked to it become the issue. There are individuals who continuously need to be in control of others and their environment, to the extent of utilizing anger to maintain that control.

Anger becomes destructive when persons possessing it believe they are justified in punishing another person or object. What drives anger is feeling threatened in ways apparent only to those who perceive themselves as vulnerable. So what can prevent anger from becoming reactive and out of control?

Immediately ask yourself, “What am I doing? Does God approve of  what I am compelled to do?” Assess the consequences of what you’re thinking. Listen to Romans 12:21. “Do not let evil get the best of you but conquer evil by doing good.” Pray that God will bless whoever is the object of your anger. 

                      

___________ 

But I tell you to … pray for anyone who mistreats you. Then you will be acting like your Father in heaven.

~Matthew 6:44-45 Contemporary English Version

___________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week.

What Makes Internalized Anger Destructive?

Anger can be a driving force that seeks to correct what is wrong within a relationship and within oneself. It can be a source for destructive behavior leading to alienation. Internalized anger becomes a barrier to fellowship and intimacy by creating emotional distance. Internalized anger occurs by suppressing its expression.

Mistakes in perception create anger that can be sustained for a lifetime. The younger brother in the parable of the Prodigal Son came home needing support and help after sinking so low physically and emotionally that death was imminent. The older brother had zero tolerance for his brother’s mistakes and bad choices.

The older brother misjudged his father’s joy when his younger son returned safely home. He mistakenly perceived the father’s joy as rewarding his brother’s irresponsibility, while never having rewarded his hard work. God never overlooks sin but forgives where there is repentance and regret.                            

___________ 

If you are angry, don’t sin by nursing your grudge… – get over it quickly, for when you are angry you give a mighty foothold to the devil.

~Ephesians 4:26-27 The Living Bible

___________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week. 

What Makes a Fresh Start Possible?

 There are very few areas in life where tolerance for mistakes is absent. The older son in the parable of the Prodigal Son had been outstanding in pleasing his father by managing the family business. His younger brother had pitched to the curb all opportunities to do something commendable with his life.

The younger son could never be given another inheritance simply because the older brother was now entitled to everything the father had. Remember his father’s words of assurance to this older son. “You are always with me, and everything I have is yours.” This, however, was not enough. Something was missing.

The older son's anger was generated by his father’s love for his rebellious brother. His father had received his brother back into the family and made him acceptable again. This parable demonstrates God’s love for each of us who have made bad mistakes and despicable choices but are now determined to make a clean, fresh, new beginning, empowered by God’s guidance and love.   

____________ 

Let us give thanks to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! Because of his great mercy he give us new life by raising Jesus Christ from death. This fills us with a living hope, and so we look forward to possessing the rich blessings that God keeps for his people. He keeps them for you in heaven, where they cannot decay or spoil or fade away.

~1 Peter 1:3-4 Good News Bible

____________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week.

Can There Be a Positive End to Anger?

Anger has the potential for being constructive when it serves as motivation to pursue solutions to issues. All too often, however, anger produces negative consequences for oneself and relationships. Hurt feelings and jealousy often precede anger, as in the parable of the two sons.

After work the older brother came home to discover a party celebrating the return of his wayward brother. The older son refused to participate. Listen to his outrage to his father. “All these years I’ve slaved for you and never disobeyed your orders. You never even gave me a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends.”

What is he expressing? Probably surprise, jealously, disgust – but at his core, hurt feelings have evolved into anger. Anger can be used for introducing needed change that leads to satisfaction with life. God is not interested in you remaining angry. Ask him for wisdom to escape its negative power.   

____________ 

I will answer them before they even call to me. While they are still talking to me about their needs, I will go ahead and answer their prayers!

~Isaiah 65:24 The Living Bible

____________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week.

How Does Intense Anger Interfere with Hearing?

Can you imagine being so angry that it’s impossible to listen to reason or do what is appropriate? Jonah, the Old Testament prophet, became angry with God for not destroying the wicked city of Nineveh. He mistakenly believed God loved Nineveh and hated him, which prevented him from receiving God’s blessing and reward.

When the people of Nineveh repented, they were given a new perspective on the meaning of life. That’s what the Prodigal Son experienced in a filthy pigpen. He realized that his mistakes and bad choices were responsible for his suffering and pain but that his father would be merciful and forgiving.

Jonah mistakenly believed he had lost God’s favor when God saved the people of Nineveh. The older brother of the Prodigal Son felt he had lost his father’s favor when his father gave a party for his rebellious brother. His anger prevented him from knowing the meaning of forgiveness. What a foolish mistake!                       

___________ 

I correct and punish everyone I love. So make up your minds to turn away from your sins. …If you have ears, listen to what the Spirit says to the churches.

~Revelation 3:19,23 Contemporary English Version

___________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week.

When Is Anger Acceptable?

It’s often easier to admit making mistakes than it is to acknowledge making bad choices. It’s reasonable to assume that those making an honest mistake do not feel as guilty or defensive as someone who makes a bad choice. The Prodigal Son’s older brother mistakenly believed his younger brother would never return home.

He couldn’t imagine his father throwing a lavish party for someone so irresponsible. This is not dissimilar to Jonah’s reaction when God refused to destroy the people of Nineveh after they repented and turned to him for mercy. Jonah wanted Nineveh destroyed because they were his enemy, but God, in mercy and kindness, forgave them.

Jonah’s anger paralleled the anger of the Prodigal Son’s older brother. God asked Jonah, “Do you have the right to be angry because I show kindness and mercy?” Had he forgotten God had saved him from certain death? By remembering what God has done for you, surely thanksgiving and praise will flow for his kindness and mercy. 

___________ 

Now you must repent and turn to God so that your sins may be wiped out, that your souls may know the times of refreshment which come from the presence of the Lord.

~Acts 3:19 Phillips – New Testament in Modern English

___________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week.

Is It Possible to Correct Mistakes in Perception?

Mistakes are one of those pesky problems that must be tolerated in others as well as within oneself.  A mistake can be viewed as a learning experience, as an opportunity to correct inappropriate attitudes and refrain from behaviors that have become the source of problems and troubles. Mistakes create embarrassment, frustration, and shame.

When the Prodigal Son returned home a complete failure, his father gave a party to celebrate his son’s safe arrival. His older brother was angry and resentful. He refused to be consoled because he felt betrayed by the father whom he believed showed favoritism and preference for this younger, rebellious brother.

This was a mistake in perception. The father demonstrated exactly what God’s attitude is toward us when we return home to his mercy, unfailing love, and forgiveness. Some people mistakenly believe their sins are so egregious God could never forgive and cleanse them. God’s grace is greater than all our sins.  

___________

…The more we see our sinfulness, the more we see God’s abounding grace forgiving us.

~Romans 5:20 The Living Bible

___________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week. 

How Do Errors in Judgement Affect Success?

Mistakes are unavoidable, as each person can testify. Bad choices cannot be written off as mistakes, especially when numerous warning signs have been apparent. Bad choices are made when a person is unwilling to listen to the still small voice of God, wise counsel of friends, or the voice of common sense.

When reading the Parable of the Prodigal Son, it’s impossible not to ask, “Could he not tell his funds were diminishing and his friends were vanishing?” Perhaps his immaturity and lack of judgment prevented him from even thinking about the future.  

His attitude may have paralleled so many in our culture today. Jesus faced this attitude from those who were convicted by his teaching and ministry. Their error in judgment eventually led to their downfall, the destruction of Jerusalem and the temple, as well as the nation itself. God forgives mistakes and wrong choices where there is acknowledgement and a willingness to change. 

 _____________                    

The Lord our God is merciful, and pardons even those who have rebelled against him.

~Daniel 9:9 The Living Bible

 

So remember the heights from which you have fallen, and repent [change your inner self – your old way of thinking, your sinful behavior – seek God’s will] and do the works you did at first [when you first knew me].

~Revelation 2:5 Amplified Bible

_____________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week.

When Is a Wrong Choice Not a Mistake?

Children and adults often insist that a wrong choice was just a bad mistake. An honest mistake is usually linked to confusion, limited facts, or leaving home before being mature enough to establish proper boundaries. Mistakes encourage you to evaluate choices since a choice can be tantamount to violating your conscience.

The Prodigal Son made several bad choices that proved costly. Leaving home before being mature enough to establish proper boundaries for himself made it possible for him to lose his inheritance by reckless living and bad choices.

His mistake was trusting friends to stick by him when his money evaporated. God’s mercy and kindness allow for immaturity and mistakes as well as bad choices, but still reality has to be faced. When forced to face reality, the Prodigal Son recognized his failures and repented. God gave him hope for the future and a new beginning.           

____________ 

You will never succeed in life if you try to hide your sins. Confess them and give them up, then God will show mercy to you.

~Proverbs 28:13 Good News Bible

____________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week.

What Lessons Does Experience Teach Us?

There are times when it’s difficult to distinguish if a decision is ill-advised and will evolve into a serious mistake. Making a wrong turn onto a street because of poor visibility can be excused, but choosing to exceed the speed limit in a school zone is not an acceptable mistake.

Choosing is a process of the intellect while a mistake can be attributed to faulty information or confusion. The Parable of the Prodigal Son is packed with issues for today’s believer. This young man chose to demand his inheritance early rather than wait for his father’s death.

The Prodigal Son wasn’t confused or lacking intelligence but was short on experience. To gain the respect of his son, the father permitted him to choose failure but without condemnation. The father’s choice was risky, yet he believed in his son. God permits us to make choices that may result in pain and suffering, but he never gives up on us. 

____________ 

If any of you lack wisdom, you should pray to God, who will give it to you; because God gives generously and graciously to all.

~James 1:5 Good News Bible

____________

Subscribe to the Attitudes Answers podcast on your favorite podcast platform to hear this and other 2-minute features 3 days every week.